Rivalry at Barden
by amateur-hourd
Summary: They could have been friends; or more. But there's no room for that in competitive, collegiate a-capella. Especially if they're from rival groups. AU.
1. Hood Night 1

Hello, fellow writers and readers! So, this AU is based on the fact that the first time I saw the trailer and some clips (yes, I cheated because I saw the performances before I saw the movie) for 'Pitch Perfect', I thought Jesse was the captain of the Trebles and Bumper was just an annoying dude playing co-captain or something. This gave me an idea for a story.

So, I decided to create a world in which Beca and Jesse, a Bella and a Treble, try to hate each other almost as much as Aubrey and Bumper. I thought it'd be interesting to see how they'd act if they were meant to be rivals and if they took those roles seriously. Their behavior toward each other will be explained in future flashbacks I'll post in almost every chapter.

**Disclaimer: I don't own any characters from Pitch Perfect (kill me now), only the plot. Apart from some dialogue I've used from the movie.**

* * *

_A-ca Initiation Night – Junior Year_

Beca smiles at the two new Bellas, Lian and Kristen, as they squeal and race down the steps to the beer keg.

"Damn, those munchkins have a lot of energy," Fat Amy says. Stacie nods in agreement and practically hauls Denise and Lilly by the arm as she starts heading toward the crowd gathered at the bottom of the steps.

"Let's go, a-ca bitches! Move your asses!" She shouts excitedly. The rest of the Bellas follow them down, laughing and making as much noise as possible to annoy the Trebles giving them side-eye glances from a corner.

Katherine, who joined the a-capella group just last year, turns to Beca. "You coming?"

"Yeah, I'll be right there. You go on ahead," Beca says. Katherine shrugs and runs down to meet Alex, who's waving her hand at them frantically to call them over. Beca chuckles as she sees Alex jump up and down excitedly as Stacie passes around the beer; the Bella who joined the same year as Katherine has always been overly enthusiastic. She sees Kristen and Lian nodding their heads at Amy as she tells them stories about her wild escapades at Initiation Night, making obscene hand gestures and causing the girls' faces to pale.

They are now a group of twelve. As fun as that sounds, Beca knows this year will most likely be a pain in her ass. Now she's going to have to try to keep 11 girls in line and away from all possible distractions. Crap, who is she kidding? They're all going to fool around during rehearsal and not work on their performances until last minute.

It doesn't really matter anyway. They've won the ICCA's two years in a row; this year would be no different. She looks around the bleachers, checking out the competition. The High Notes haven't exactly taken in many new members; only some twins sending paranoiac glances at the people gathered around them. Beca's not really sure they're in the right state of mind right now. She looks toward the left at the BU Harmonics, meeting Ben's gaze and rolling her eyes as the captain sneers at her. They don't exactly get along, since the preppy group was very 'traditional' and held a personal vendetta against the Bellas, especially her, for straying from exactly that.

She considers herself lucky that Aubrey had seen her way freshman year; it had taken her up-tight-former-captain-turned-friend a while (a very _long_ while), but she had finally relented and left the Bellas in Beca's care.

Her gaze then moves on to the four new Trebles standing in the corner; she only remembers one of their names, Ethan, she thinks. He had shown he knew how to beat-box almost as well as Donald at the auditions, so it isn't a surprise that he got in. Beca doesn't remember the other three's performances but she's sure they have amazing voices; it's an official requirement for a Treble. She frowns as she feels someone's eyes on her, already knowing who it is and purposefully angling her head in the opposite direction. She walks down the steps toward her group, ignoring the imaginary tingles on the back of her head.

"Beca! Good, you're here! Now, let's toast," Jessica says, holding her cup up high as if it were a champagne flute. "To one hell of a freshman, sophomore, and junior year for all of us, and one hell of a year for the Bellas!"

"Here, here!" Ashley smiles as she knocks cups with Lilly and all of the Bellas raise their drinks high in the air as they repeat her words.

"This is awesome!" Lian grins as she and Kristen chug the beer in one gulp.

"Careful, babes. There's always crazy shit happening on Initiation Night; you don't want to get drunk too quickly," Cynthia Rose says, raising her eyebrows. "Especially because there's an oath to respect."

Lian and Kristen immediately look toward the Trebles on the opposite side of the bleachers. "Why can't we be…uh…'Treble-boned', again?" Asked Kristen.

Fat Amy shrugs, "It's the only form of tradition we follow; it's been in the Bella pledge for _years_. Almost as many as my sexy, fat ass has been toned." Lilly nods her head and hums in agreement.

"Don't worry, girlies. I have contacts; I'll make sure you guys get boned elsewhere," Stacie says winking at them. "Forget the Trebles; they're not that hot."

Fat Amy coughs, "Says the one who couldn't keep it in her pants last ye-" she gets cut off as Stacie elbows her in the chest, accidentally hitting her boobs. "Watch it! My girls are sensitive!"

Alex exhales, "It's not so hard, really. Just ignore their good hair and sexy voices." Katherine gives her a looks that says, "Yeah, that helps."

The rest of the Bellas start filling Kristen and Lian in on the proper way to all but ignore the all-male a-capella group as Beca gets the feeling she's being watched again. _That son of a- He'll never stop, will he? _She narrows her eyes as she looks to the far left and her glare meets big, brown eyes.

Jesse. Swanson.

If she could, she would burn a hole through his head; and judging by the way he's smirking at her, he knows it, too. She stares back at him coolly as he gives her a mocking grin and lifts his cup up in a toast. Beca shoots him a sarcastic smile and blows him a kiss. She rolls her eyes as he mimics catching it and putting it in his pocket for safe-keeping, then patting his heart. He finally turns away when one of the other Trebles calls his name.

When she turns back to the Bellas, she catches Amy's gaze, who raises her eyebrows and looks between her and the Treble Captain, asking a silent 'what went on there?' Beca just waves her off and looks toward the rest of the group, pretending to nod along to whatever they were saying.

Sometimes she couldn't help get so worked up over him; that dude would always be a royal pain in her ass.

* * *

_**A-ca Initiation Night – Freshman Year **_

"_Beca! Be-caw!"_

"_Wow," she says as she turns to the nerd using her name as a bird call. Seriously, why does this dude keep showing up everywhere?_

"_Do my eyes deceive me or are you in a-capella?" He says nodding his head like his theory on her has just been proved right. _

_She squints up at him as he crosses over the final bench and invades her personal space. "No," she says, taking a step back and shaking her head at him sarcastically, because come on. Why else would she be here?_

_Jesse smiles. "You're one of those a-capella girls and I'm one of those a-capella boys and we're gonna have a-ca children. It's inevitable," he says matter-of-factly._

"_You're really drunk right now; I don't think you're gonna remember any of this," she tells him after getting over the initial shock of what he just said to her. This weirdo seriously just told her that they were gonna make future a-ca-what now? _

"_No," he says shaking his head with an unfocused look in his eyes. "I'm not drunk at all, you're just blurry." She chuckles at that, because that was actually kind of cute. Not that she likes cute things or anything. She makes to speak but he cuts her off before she can. "So, what group are you in?" he asks her excitedly. "The High Notes? You don't look like the type, though. But I really can't imagine you in the BU Harmonics, either. Is there a new group? One with sarcastic quips and scary ear spikes?"_

_She sighs when he stares at her expectantly. At least he stopped rambling. "Barden Bellas, actually. Unfortunately." _

_Jesse's smile dims and this causes her to raise an eyebrow. "No, you're not a Bella," he says frowning._

_She crosses her arms and stares back at him. "Uh, yeah I am. Why? That group too girly for me or something?" It actually is too girly for her and Jesse knows it, too. But the way he told her she wasn't a Bella was kind of insulting. _

"_You can't be in that group," he blurts out. "Not because they're too good for you or anything but- can't you join another one?" He asks with a pleading look in his eyes._

"_Um, you're being a total weirdo right now," she says furrowing her brow. Why was this so important to him?_

"_Never mind. Can I get you a drin-"_

"_Ey, Jesse!" Jesse and Beca look in the direction of the annoying voice only to see a guy with a face that resembles a pig waving him over. "What the hell are you doing? Get over here!"_

_Jesse sighs and looks back at her. "I gotta go. I'll see you at the station, right?"_

_Beca's still staring at the guy, who's now glaring at her, and she notices that he's wearing the same hoodie as Jesse. Huh. Must be an a-capella thing. She turns back to Jesse and tries to ignore the urge to ask him to stay. She had been bored until he'd started bird-calling her. "Sure. It's where we work- so," she shrugs._

_He grins at her, "Right. See you, Be-caw." She rolls her eyes and calls out "Please be careful" as he starts climbing over benches again to head over to his teammate. _

_She keeps an eye on the dork to make he doesn't trip or anything, but is then distracted by Chloe. Great; another one who just loves invading her personal space. _

* * *

So...are you guys getting it so far? Like I said, future flashbacks will further explain how they got to that "rival" stage, because you can tell they were friends at some point. Hopefully, you guys will like this!

Next chapter will be from Jesse's POV and there'll be a flashback from his freshman year, too. And don't worry, they don't actually hate each other; you know I need these two to be together (it's a problem). This movie has ruined me.


	2. Hood Night 2

I'm sorry I've taken so long on updating. I'll try to post the chapters sooner from now on. Thanks for the reviews, guys! I'm glad you like the concept. And sorry about the sucky image, but it was the best I could do -_-

By the way, I've decided to put the flashbacks at the beginning from now on. They won't always be directly related to the chapters; they're just to give you a sense of what went on in freshman year and in sophomore year too (but those won't be for a while).

* * *

_**First day at the Station – Freshman Year**_

_He does know her. He sang to her. And people don't just forget he sang to them. His voice has that effect. _

_His jokes aren't helping much, though (not even the 'marihuana job offer' one; it's a classic). All she does is respond with sarcastic quips. Even when he tries to flirt with her, her expression basically says "You're a weirdo." Actually she does tell him that._

"_Yeah, I am. And so are you. It's a good thing we're gonna be best friends, and/or lovers," he says gleefully. _

"_Please don't say 'lovers'," she shakes her head at him and walks over to the old shelf to stack the first of many CD's. _

"_You know, I wouldn't pass this up. Once I'm a Treble, I probably won't have any time for you," Jesse tells her with a faux-pity look on his face. _

"_Wow. No. I didn't think there was a way for you to be any less attractive to me, but congratulations. You've managed it," she says sarcastically, shooting him a tight-lipped smile. _

_He starts talking as she's pretending to ignore him while looking at CD covers. "Just wait. You'll go all squidgy; drape yourself all over me. It'll be fun. You'll see," he says seriously. She looks up at him like he's just sprouted two heads, but at least he got her attention. And anyway, he hopes for it because he really does enjoy the idea of having her go gaga over him. Though, his cousin may have exaggerated the 'perks' of being a Treble because Jesse doubts that'll be the case. Sure, there are such things as a-capella groupies but he's certain this girl isn't one of them._

_He glances at her from the corner of his eye as she goes to stack more CD's and continues to discreetly check her out. Or at least, what's 'discreet' for him. He's liked her since he serenaded her from his car window on Move-In Day and he doesn't even know her name. He thought he heard Luke mention it earlier but she really doesn't look like a 'Becky'; what with the ear spike and all the ear piercings. Jesse wonders if she has any tattoos other than the one on her right forearm. _

"_Quit staring at me," she murmurs as she stands up on her tip-toes to reach a high shelf. He walks over to take the CD from her hand and stacks it himself, trying to down play the amusement on his face because he's just realized how tiny she is. "So what's your name?" _

_She rolls her eyes at him and walks back over to the CD box. "Aren't you supposed to be sorting?"_

"_Yup. What's your name?" He asks again, coming over to lean back on the desk beside her. He casually picks up an album and starts reading the playlist on the back. _

"_Can we not do the whole 'getting to know you' thing? Let's just maintain a strict co-worker relationship," she tells him, reaching over for another box._

"_So you do want a relationship with me," Jesse says, purposefully deepening his voice and smirking at her. She shoots him a look he raises his hands in surrender. "Fine. No talking for now. But I think it's pretty unfair that you know my name and I don't know yours," he frowns as he remembers what an ass-hat their boss was after he introduced himself._

"_I'm not the one who was late," she shrugs. He resists the urge to stick his tongue out at her because he doesn't think that will help him with the progress he's made so far…which is not much, but at least she's not glaring anymore. _

_After three of the most boring CD stacking hours you can imagine, they finally finish with…three boxes? This job is gonna suck. Well, maybe not so much if he's gets to work with her._

_He's still gathering his stuff as she heads for the door. "It's Beca, by the way."_

_Jesse turns around in surprise and looks at her confusedly. She rolls her eyes at him "My name. It's Beca." Then she walks out the door. And he smiles as he resists the urge to pump a fist in the air in victory because Luke is side-eying him from the booth. Beca. It fits much better than 'Becky'. _

* * *

_A-ca Initiation Night – Junior Year_

He had never really appreciated Justin for manning the music; you don't know what you've got until it's gone, right? The new guy doesn't know what he's doing. Jesse raises his eyebrow at the questionable boy band music that starts playing.

"This year won't be the same," Brandon says, ruffling his brunette, blonde-tipped locks.

"No kidding. It's gonna be weird not having Austin backing us up on the beat-boxing. First Donald, now him. We're sort of screwed," Jesse frowns. "And most of you leave this year."

"I know! It's weird, man. At least you still got Benji and Kolio, though." Unicycle lifts his chin in the direction of the aforementioned Trebles, both of whom are fearfully eying Fat Amy strutting her stuff and purposefully knocking down BU Harmonics out of the way towards the keg.

Jesse nods and turns to Brandon. "Hey, did Donald tell you why he was coming down for the first mixer? I doubt we'll have much trouble but it'll be good to see him anyway," he shrugs.

Brandon rolls his eyes. "Yeah, Bumper put him up to it. You know, to 'check up' on his 'loser team'; but Donald said he had been planning to come see us anyway."

Jesse snorts as he shakes his head at his former captain's darling words; Bumper never had any tact when it came to dealing with people. And that included friends and family; he should know.

"He doesn't really have any say; he ditched us to go get his 'big break'." Which is now nonexistent but Jesse doesn't like to rub that fact in his cousin's face. Only sometimes. Sure, it had happened two years ago, but it still bothers the Trebles who had been there, especially Donald. But that's how Bumper is; selfish, rude and annoying. The a-capella group still talks to him, because they know Bumper can't help the fact that he's a jerk. And Jesse's used to it because he's had to live with it his whole life.

Brandon nods, "You know what he's like. The Trebles were his pride and joy at one point, and now that he has no 'big break' to speak of, it's gonna get even worse." This is true; it sometimes scared them how involved Bumper still was.

Anyway, his cousin had done something right before leaving. It had to do with his parting words from the Treble House: "They're all yours now, cuz," he had said, throwing Jesse a 'peace out' sign as he went out the door.

Sure, the Trebles haven't won the ICCA's in two years, but Jesse's proud of the performances they've come up with. Everyone says they're way better than anything Bumper's ever done; it's just that…they have fierce competition. He takes a gulp of beer from his cup to resist the urge to glance back at her.

He's brought out of his musings as Benji walks up to them with a grin. "Did you guys know Tyler can put a whole fist in his mouth? Not even I, a true magician, can do that." If there's one thing Benji's cocky about, it's his magic.

Jesse chuckles as Unicycle says, "I'm not surprised. The dude's got a big mouth; it's probably why he has such great vocals." Benji nods his head and then the four of them turn their heads toward the speakers when they hear shouting.

"Dude, you suck at this. Let me handle it," Beca says as she stops the music and takes out one of her hard drives to plug into the laptop. People cheer as the beginning notes of one of her mixes start playing. The guy whose name is unknown slinks off, looking a bit relieved. All the groups start to mingle as they gather at the bottom and start to dance.

"You guys think I'll get lucky tonight with one of the newbies?" Brandon asks, tilting his head in the direction of the two freshman Bellas.

Benji pales. "But Brandon, what about what happened last yea-" he abruptly stops talking as Brandon makes his way down the steps and inches closer to the Bella with short, dark hair. Jesse, Unicycle, and Benji watch on amusedly as he whispers something in her ear and the girl turns toward him with an offended look on her face, only to pour her drink on him. The Bellas dancing near by burst into laughter and give her a thumbs-up as they shout, "Yeah, Lian!"

Only one laugh stands out to him; the loud, musical one coming from the girl bent over the laptop, looking over her shoulder at the scene. Before she turns back to the screen, her eyes meet his and she gives him her patented smirk.

He narrows his eyes at her and turns away. Jesse catches Benji watching him with a knowing look. "So…I'm gonna go say hi to Beca. You coming?" He asks, even though he already knows the answer.

Jesse grunts and shakes his head as he takes another gulp from his cup and watches his friend make his way over to the girl that has confused the hell out of him since freshman year. It's just his luck that his best friend's now a good friend of Beca's. Well, he can't really complain much; he's the one who introduced them back then. He knew his stalkerish tendencies would come back to bite him in the ass.

He winces as he hears their voices near by, Benji asking Beca about the new recruits and inviting her over to the keg. Where he's now standing. _Shit. _

"Hey Jesse," Benji says awkwardly, just noticing his friend there. Jesse doesn't blame him; he blames his beer cravings. He turns around to give Benji a tight lipped smile and reluctantly faces Beca because he can't just pointedly ignore her. "Hey, Mitchell."

"Swanson." The only good thing about this encounter is that she looks just as uncomfortable as he feels. It's weird; they'll mock each other, tease each other, glare and sneer and taunt. But it's always from a distance. He can't do those things up close, it's too personal. "Excuse me," he mutters as he walks past them. He hears Benji starts a random conversation to diffuse the tension and feels her eyes on his back. It makes him frown and walk a bit faster. He has another full cup of beer; he shouldn't have any trouble forgetting Beca Mitchell, at least for tonight.


	3. Labor Pains

So, we're past the 'introduction' to Beca and Jesse's 'feelings' (kinda) and now onto some interaction.

* * *

_**Almost Picnic at the Quad – Freshman Year**_

"_It sounds…complex," Beca says, taking sips from her juice pouch as Jesse explains the riff-off. She tries not to show how much she actually likes the stupid juice but it's Strawberry Kiwi; it's pretty good. _

"_Eh," he shrugs. "It sounds cool though, right?" He asks her excitedly, smiling at the fact that she finished the juice pouch in a span of two minutes. Jesse opens his box of pretzels and holds it out to her. Beca takes some and chews slowly while scrunching her nose up as she considers the rules of the 'Riff Off' again in her head. But then she soon realizes she's not supposed to care, so… It's not like Militaristic Aubrey would take her opinion into account anyway. _

"_So when should we start your movication? Are you free Thursday night?" Jesse asks, trying to act casual as he pops more pretzels into his mouth. She doesn't want to lead him on or anything but really, the kid's harmless. He wants to educate her on _movies, _for Pete's sake. And she maybe, sort of likes hanging out with him. Kind of. So it's not such a big deal for them to watch random movies together, right? She'll fall asleep anyway. They wouldn't be at the station, though. And that's already enough to make her nervous; there wouldn't be any equal ground. _

"_Sure," she sighs, ignoring the glance of victory he shoots her. "But we'll do it at my dorm." That way, at least she'll have the advantage of being able to kick him out if anything does go wrong. _

"_Awesome!" He says smiling at her. She gives him a tiny smile back because his enthusiasm is hard to resist. "You'll need some cheering up after Wednesday night since the Trebles will undoubtedly beat you guys into the dust at the Riff Off," he says cheekily. _

_Beca snorts. "Right. Best of luck to you guys, really," she says dryly as she focuses her attention back on her mixes. She notices Jesse glancing at her from the corner of her eye for a couple of minutes and she turns to him with an exasperated "What?"_

_He tilts his head at her and asks, "You really don't care? Because our groups basically hate each other. It's a miracle we're even able to talk without my cousin coming over to bite my head off."_

_Beca laughs, "Wait, that dude Amy won't stop complaining about is your cousin? The one who glares at us whenever we're within a five foot radius?" She really can't see the resemblance. Not only with the personalities but the looks too because Jesse is much better- Woah. Never mind. _

_Jesse shrugs. "Yeah. Bumper sort of takes the whole rival thing seriously. He really hates you guys, though. But I mean, your captain, the blonde, is basically the same, right?"_

"_Aubrey? Are you kidding? She talks smack about your group whenever she gets the chance. Sometimes I think she might spontaneously combust," Beca smirks. _

_Jesse chuckles. "Well I don't really care what Bumper thinks. I like you, Beca. But I still think the Trebles will beat your ass because we're just that good," he says quickly, trying to play off his former sentence like no big deal. _

_She tries to ignore the flush on her face as he grins at her and rolls her eyes. "And I really don't care. It's like everyone here's willing to kill for a stupid trophy or something," she shrugs. _

"_You say that now, but soon you'll feel the need to win just as much as the rest of us. Competition is healthy, you know," he chuckles as she squints her eyes at him and then moves her stare over to her laptop again. Jesse reaches for more pretzels and another juice pouch from his bag. _

"_Uh, Jesse?" Beca says._

_He looks over at her. "Yeah?"_

"_Why the hell did you bring a candle?" She asks amused. _

_He glances at said candle and looks back at her while she tries not to smile at the sheepish look on his face. "You mean that's not romantic in the middle of broad daylight?"_

* * *

_Bella Rehearsal – Junior Year_

"Keep going, nerds! You only have three more laps left!" Beca tries to ignore Amy's death threats as she answers the phone. "Yeah?"

"Beca, It's Ian." She tries not to groan as she wonders why on earth Luke's protégé could possibly be calling her. "There's been a change in your schedule."

She frowns. "What do you mean? I always have the night shifts."

"I know. You'll still have them but we have to cut back your hours. So you can make up those in the afternoons."

Beca grits her teeth. "But that means I'll be coming and going from the station; I don't have time for that."

"It'll only be on Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays."

She sucks in a deep breath and rubs her forehead. "That's even worse," she mumbles. "Those aren't good days for me." Especially since Swanson has those same hours and that's just a disaster waiting to happen.

"Look, we have new interns coming in and we have to put them somewhere. It's the only option. If you don't want them, you'll be working less hours and that means less pay."

_Damn it. _"Fine." _She can't wait to be her own boss next year. _

"Great. You start tomorrow." After she hangs up she has the urge to throw her phone across the auditorium.

"Woah, Shawshank. What has your flat butt looking like someone just put salt in your drink," Fat Amy pants as she finishes the last lap and crashes down onto the floor.

Beca sighs, "It's nothing. I think we're done now so go get some rest guys. We have the fall mixer coming up and we'll need to get ready for that soon." She bends down to pick up her bag and starts gathering her laptop and iPod shuffle. Beca turns when she feels a tap on her shoulder and sees Kristen standing there, wringing her hands together nervously. "What's up?" She asks.

"Hey, um. I have a few song suggestions actually. I don't know how this works," she says gesturing to the auditorium rehearsal space with her hand, "But I was wondering if you took suggestions into account."

"Yeah, of course. Everyone's opinion counts here," Beca smiles reassuringly at the tall redhead. "Just write down any ideas you have and post them on the bulletin board over there," she points to the board covered in colorful post-its off to the side. Kristen nods and smiles as she walks back to collect her stuff.

"Okay, so I'll see you nerds next rehearsal," Beca says as she starts to walk away.

She's stopped by Alex rushing in to block her exit. "Wait! We won't be doing cardio again, right?" She whines, wiping the sweat on her temple and forehead.

Beca chuckles, "No. It'll be like last year; cardio only on Monday evenings, because everyone's free then right? Next rehearsal we'll go over the suggestion board and go out for something to eat while deciding which songs to use for the mixer." She rolls her eyes as the rest of the Bellas erupt into overdramatic cheers.

* * *

_Tuesday Afternoon – New Shift at the Station_

_Yippee_

She's not nervous. She just likes to walk very slowly. That's probably why it takes her fifteen whole minutes to head over to the station. As Beca approaches the front door, she looks around frantically to make sure no one's near. And by no one, she means a tall brunette.

Right as she reaches for the door knob, she gets the bright idea to go around back, just in case. That way, she won't have to walk past him to the booth. Beca walks around the station, heading for the back entrance and right as she's about to reach out and open the door- she gets smacked in the face.

"Ow! Shit!" She cradles her head as she tries to sit up on the floor.

"Crap! Oh, crap! I'm sorry!"

She can barely open her eyes right now, because she's dizzy, but she swears that voice sounds familiar. She feels herself being picked up from the ground by her arms and hears the person murmuring apologies as they check her head.

"Did I hit you?" They ask frantically.

"No, the door hit me by itself. What do you think you asshole? Of course you hit me!" Okay, so she's not so dizzy she can't hurl insults. She wearily opens her eyes a bit as the person keeps on apologizing and frowns as she gets a glimpse of the iconic, maroon Treble hoodie. "Great. Of course you're a Treble. Just made my day," she huffs. Then her whole body freezes up because there's only one Treble who even goes near the station. And it's the last one she wants to see. "Swanson!" She tries to glare up at him with her eyes semi-closed. "You idiot!"

Said idiot has a surprised look on his face and tries to unsuccessfully hold back a smile. _Jerk. _"Well, who else did you expect to see, Mitchell? You know this is my shift. What are you doing lounging around the back, anyway?" He quickly draws back his hands from her head when he realizes he was still fingering the bruise forming on her forehead.

"Ian, the pompous asshole, changed my shifts. And I came around back because I felt like it," she sniffs as she tries to walk around him into the station but one step and she's wobbling around like the defeated dingo in Amy's wrestling videos. She smacks his hands away when he tries to steady her, though and instead leans against the wall next to the door. "What were _you_ doing using the back entrance? No one uses it. And do you always have to open doors with that much force?" Beca squints up at him.

Jesse shrugs. "I was taking out the trash," he says lifting a black bag in his hands. "And I didn't know anyone would be here; like you said, no one ever comes around back."

Beca grumbles, "Yeah, okay." She stares down at her feet as she tries to remember how to put one foot in front of the other. She hears Jesse put the trash away and then feels his hand on her shoulder.

"Do you need to go to the nurses'? I really am sorry," he says, gently pushing her in through the doorway and stepping in behind her to lock the door.

"No, I'm fine. The dizziness has faded," Beca says as she prods the bruise on her forehead and scowls.

"So, Ian changed your shift. That's…couldn't he have given you another one?" Jesse asks warily.

She scoffs. "You think I didn't try that? It's not like this is a dream come true for me, Swanson." Neither of them had wanted to back down in sophomore year, both wanting to keep their jobs at the station without having to see each other. The schedule had worked out great, until now. Stupid Ian.

"Good to know, Mitchell," he rolls his eyes. "It doesn't matter. We'll just stay out of each other's way and this won't be a problem."

"That was my plan all along, genius," Beca snaps as she makes her way to the booth. She hears a sarcastic "This'll be fun" and a frustrated huff behind her. She bristles as she enters the booth and shuts the door loudly. Her first day here and her encounter with him has already bruised her.

That's just lovely; she couldn't wait to work with him.

That asshole.

* * *

So I got that door scene from a Disney movie (Starstruck). I'm not a dork; I was just a fan of Disney. But really, nothing's wrong with being a dork =) (If there's anything Beca and Jesse have taught us, it's that).


	4. Accident

So, I know people have been asking where this is going, and I completely understand. It's just that I need to make it realistic and I can't have them not 'hating' each other in four or five chapters, so please be patient. I miss writing Beca and Jesse acting all lovey with each other, but this an interesting change and definitely a challenge for me. I promise there will be sexual tension soon and all that. I will get there people ;)

* * *

_**Riff Off – Wednesday Night – Freshman Year**_

_By the time Beca sings the final verse of 'No Diggity', everyone's cheering and he's clapping, nodding his head at her and accepting his defeat. Bumper looks at him weirdly and Jesse just shrugs. _

"_Whatever," Bumper mutters to him, trying to shrug off their loss while Jesse pretends to agree even though he can't seem to fight the urge to grin at Beca. He's kind of worried for his cousin, though, because he looks like he's about to pop a vessel. But then Justin's naming the Trebles the winners because Beca broke a rule and even though what she just did was awesome (and really hot), Jesse can't help but join into the loud cheers the guys break into. Donald pats his shoulder and pushes him ahead with the group to go celebrate; meanwhile he's shooting Beca apologetic glances because the blonde chick looks pissed and he has an inkling of who she's gonna take it out on. _

_He decides to wait for her at the top of the pool deck, lagging behind and letting the rest of the guys walk past him. He can tell Donald notices as he passes, giving him a knowing grin. Unfortunately, though, Bumper is not so easily dissuaded. _

"_What are you doing? Let's go," he says glancing back at Fat Amy, who's shooting him an 'I'm watching you' sign, and grabbing Jesse's shoulder as he hauls him forward. _

"_Actually, I'll catch up with you guys later; I'm gonna stay for a bit," Jesse shrugs, waving it off as no big deal. _

_Bumper narrows his eyes at him. "That alternative chick isn't worth the hassle, Jess. She's just gonna hold you back and I've worked too hard preparing you for the Trebles for you to mess this up." _

_Jese raises his eyebrows at him. "Preparing me? Dude, you insult my performance skills every chance you get-"_

"_And look how that's worked out for you. You've stepped up your game each and every time to prove me wrong. You get my spot next year, as captain. Don't jeopardize all that for a stupid crush. I know lots of girls that'll make you forget all about-"_

"_I'm staying. I'll see you at the Treble house later," Jesse grits out through clenched teeth._

_Bumper grimaces. "Don't come crawling to me when your precious Beca leaves you with nothing but a 'thanks for the fuck' note in the morning."_

"_It's not like tha-" But Bumper's already walking away. Jesse runs his hand through his hair. For all he puts up with from Bumper, his cousin does care. He just never expresses it well. Ever._

_He whistles and pretends to be fascinated by the graffiti on the dirty wall to his left as he hears the Bellas climb out of the pool and head for campus. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Beca slow her steps as she spots him. Once she makes sure Aubrey's too far ahead to notice and waves bye to Amy, who gives her many exaggerated winks, she walks over._

"_Hey weirdo," she says as she crosses her arms to protect herself against the breeze that blows by. _

"_Hello, best friend and future lover." He laughs as she makes a face at him and yells out "Dude, no!"_

"_Told you we'd beat you guys into the dust," he grins smugly. _

_Beca rolls her eyes. "Yeah, well, the rules are stupid anyway. We should have won."_

"_I thought you didn't care," he teases and smiles when she scrunches her nose at him and mutters an "I don't". _

"_So, why'd you wait for me?" She smirks at him. Jesse chuckles and scratches the back of his neck in a nervous habit._

"_I just wanted to know if we were still on for tomorrow. You know, just to make sure." He really hopes she hadn't changed her mind._

_Beca bites her lip. "Yeah. For our _movication_, right?" She says, making air quotes around the word 'movication'. Jesse chuckles and nods at her. After a beat of silence, she says, "Eightish?" _

_He lets out a relieved breath and grins, "It's a date." He ignores the bewildered look she shoots him and snickers as he walks away, ignoring her call of "No dude, it's not!"_

_**Breakfast Club Fiasco – Thursday Night**_

"_Someone's early," she remarks as she opens her door and lets him in, walking back to her mixing program on her laptop. _

"_I'm punctual, what can I say?" He says, setting down his laptop and DVD on her bed. "What's that?" He nods to her laptop screen. _

"_My…music. I like making music," She shrugs, trying to play it off as no big deal but he can tell it kind of is. Her desk is barely visible under all the expensive equipment and there's even a keyboard on the side. _

"_Can you show me?" He asks hopefully. She glances at him warily but something about his face must tell her he actually means it because then she's sitting up and reaching for her headphones. Beca starts telling him about 'chord progressions' and 'down beats' and he gazes at her because it's like she's his musical counterpart. Yeah, it sounds cheesy, but he's a movie fanatic so it's expected. _

_He smiles at her remark of talking loudly and just nods because he really hadn't noticed; he likes listening to her voice. He happily reaches for the headphones when she fidgets with them, not knowing if she should offer them to him to see if he would want to listen. He has no idea why she's so nervous, her music is amazing and he tells her so because she's looking at him so earnestly and it's hard not to stare at her like she's the best thing he's ever come across. He awkwardly reaches back for his movie when he realizes he's been gazing rather intently. _

The Breakfast Club; _one of his all time favorites. Once he makes himself comfortable on her bed (he really hadn't noticed he 'made himself at home' everywhere until she voiced it), he reaches over to turn off the lamp, coating the room in darkness and ignoring her intentional throat clearing, hoping the look on his face is innocent enough. _

_Jesse starts rambling on about the movie's 'fun facts' and he even banters with Beca on Judd Nelson's breakfast preferences. When he subconsciously starts mouthing the character's parting words, he notices her looking at him from the corner of his eye. And when he pumps his fist through the air (but plays it down so she won't think he's a total dork), like he's always done, she gets that same sarcastic smile she had on the day he sang to her from his car. _

_So, yes, he does think it's a good idea to try and kiss her. When he sees the flicker of doubt in her eyes, though, he knows she's going to pull back. So he leans forward to close that last bit of space between them and brushes his lips against hers, feeling her sharp intake of breath. Beca stays frozen against his lips for a minute, and it seems like neither wants to move away but they don't have the courage to apply more pressure, either. Then Kimmy Jin, her lovely roommate with impeccable timing, opens the door with friends and that causes them to hastily pull back and act like nothing happened. Jesse reluctantly leaves when he sees that Beca's not going to look at him, instead choosing to gaze down intently at her fingernails. _

_She avoids him for two weeks after that._

* * *

_Tuesday at the Radio Station – Junior Year_

The air is thick. And they're suffocating.

"This is all your fault," Beca grits out.

He clenches his fists because he's seriously tired of her placing all the blame on him. "It was an _accident_. And it's not like you helped." Jesse bends down to start picking up the fallen records, grimacing at the ones in pieces. _Ian's going to kill him_.

"I'm sorry," she says sweetly. "I just thought that as a guy, you would have no trouble carrying a few boxes, but I guess I can't really expect you to be that manly, can I Swanson?" Beca turns her back to him as she starts collecting the CDs on the other side of the room.

"You're just a joy to work with, you know that?" He barks as he stands up and slams the records on the table, walking over to the storage closet to get a trash bag.

Beca looks up at him and glares. "I'm not the one who stupidly dropped three boxes worth of CDs. Knowing Ian, it's going to come out of both our paychecks because of 'coworker camaraderie' or something equally as dumb. Thanks a lot."

Jesse starts picking up the broken pieces, hardly paying any attention to her. "Anyone ever tell you, you talk too much?" he grunts.

Beca turns to look at him incredulously. "Says the one who hasn't been able to shut up since the day I met him." She reaches for one side of the bag and frowns as she hastily throws in five broken records.

Jesse says nothing in return and continues picking up the shards. They had managed to work in silence for two weeks, up until now. He doesn't understand why she's so difficult; he had forced himself to be as polite as possible while working with Beca, not wanting to argue in their work space, lest Ian come running in to scold them if their arguments ever escalate to the point that the receptionist hears them, which has happened before. He had been juggling three boxes, trying to quickly set them down on the desk; which had been his first mistake. But he had seen her glancing at him from the booth, so she should have tried to help, though he hadn't really expected her to. One misstep and it all came crashing down.

The weeks of silence and the CDs; they both came crashing down.

"Go grab another bag, we have to get rid of all this before Ian gets in," Beca barks at him as she snatches the bag and bends down to gather more damaged CDs.

Jesse huffs and turns to walk up the stairs to the second floor.

"What are you doing?" she snaps.

"There are duplicates here; I'm going to use them to fill up that empty shelf so Ian won't notice. And if he does, it won't be until months later," he says, reaching into the cabinet partway hidden behind a tall shelf. "So calm the hell down; you're getting on my nerves." Jesse grabs the heavy load and makes his way down the stairs.

"Don't drop them," Beca tells him mockingly. She ties the two sides of the full-to-the-hilt bag into a knot and leans back unto the desk as she watches him unpack the albums and start stacking them.

"You're doing it wrong," she says.

Jesse grinds his teeth together, but doesn't turn to face her. "I've been stacking CDs for about two years now. I think I know how to do it, thanks."

Beca rolls her eyes. "That's what makes it even sadder, ner-" she clears her throat. "Do you not know how to alphabetize?" she mocks. Beca walks over to switch the two CDs he had mistakenly placed in the wrong order.

"Well, you're here, distracting me," he blurts and then winces. "Don't you have to go run the booth?"

"I left the track playing," she replies absentmindedly. The fact that she's standing next to him, stacking CDs, reminds her too much of freshman year.

"Right. Your track. Not a very good one, is it? You may need to step up your game, Mitchell." He needs her to move away. He's not lost on the symbolization of her stacking CDs with him like she had that first year. Except their feelings are completely different this time around. Well, his feelings. He had never really known how she'd felt, had he?

His insult works, because she turns to stare at him menacingly. "What do you know about good music, Swanson? Because you haven't exactly proven you have good taste in any genre, have you?"

He raises an eyebrow at her. So they're going to argue about a-capella song choices, were they? Fine. "Sure, they're not Grammy award winning songs all the time. But they get the crowd heated up and they leave their mark. Our performances are memorable. You guys can barely decide on two songs; it's a miracle your sets don't end up in catastrophe."

Beca crosses her arms and leans her hip on the shelf. "Your boy band music is overdone and one of these days, not even your little a-capella groupies will see sense in them."

"You're just angry because those songs always get us first place at Regionals," he says as he narrows his eyes at her.

"And you're jealous because we get to take home the first-place trophy at Semi-Finals and the ICCA's," she retorts as she leans forward.

"Don't worry," Jesse coos mockingly, making Beca want to slap him. "You won't have to bruise your tiny arms, trying to carry that trophy home this year, since we'll gladly take it from you," he says, tugging at one of her curls, smirking as she slaps his hand away.

"You wish, Swanson," she seethes. "It's really too bad; you'll be disappointing your darling cousin again, won't you," she gives him a tight-lipped smile as she watches his eyes darken in anger. "Always trying to please him, right?" Beca swallows, ignoring the lump in her throat and frowning at the turn the conversation has taken.

Jesse stares at her. "I-"

"Beca, why aren't you manning the booth?" Ian cries, entering the station and visibly startling both of them.

"Chill Ian," she says as she regains her breath. "I have a track playing." She frowns at her sometimes over-the-top boss as he waves her on to get back to work. She rolls her eyes as she starts to walk around Jesse, not having realized how close they had gotten to each other.

He holds his breath as she walks past him, waiting to hear the booth door close before breathing again. He turns to Ian, who's watching him with a raised eyebrow and an unamused expression on his face.

"I should have listened to Luke when he said not to have you two working in the same space. But alas, this is the schedule that works. So deal with it, and try not to have sex on his desk."

Jesse stutters out nonsensical words as he tries to come up with a suitable retort. Finally, he just sighs and flattens his stare, wearing a bored mask. "Right."

Ian gives him a look that's says, "I better not walk in on this again," and then starts explaining why he came here in the first place. It's something about 'wanting to pass on new rules about how the second floor is a no sex zone as well' but Jesse's too distracted to pay any attention, instead choosing to nod his head at appropriate times and act like he's listening. He's too busy thinking about the hurt look in Beca's eyes and unwillingly wishing he hadn't been the one to put it there.

* * *

_At the Treble House _

"But you guys have the mixer next week," Donald tells him over the phone.

"Yeah, I know. We'll get to it, don't worry. You know the guys procrastinate a bit on the first performance. But it always turns out great, anyway," Jesse tells Donald, trying to serve himself some juice at the same time as keeping an eye on Benji, who's decided to try his 'box of swords' trick again, which has never ended well.

"Sure, sure," Donald replies. "How's work with my 'Becanator'?"

"You heard about that, huh?" Jesse grunts as he hastily leaves his half-filled cup to run over and help Unicycle pull Benji out of the box.

"We talked last week, but she didn't mention it to me. Probably because she didn't want to hear my sexual innuendos. But yeah, Benji told me," Donald chuckles. "Have you two killed each other, yet? Or you know," he says, lowering his voice. "Have you _worked out the tension_?"

Jesse huffs as he and Uni finally manage to get Benji breathing again. "There's tension, but not the kind that you think."

"Right," Donald drawls. "How deep in denial are you?"

"Okay, so," Jesse says, changing the subject and ignoring Donald's snort. "I'll email you when we get the performance down and you can tell me what you think."

"It's for a sorority, right?"

"Hell yeah!" Unicycle says, having heard the conversation and taking the phone from Jesse to tell Donald about 'all the mega hot chicks' as Jesse sits Benji upright and claps him on the back.

"You okay, man?" He asks him.

"Totally. I need to try that again," Benji says excitedly.

"Okay," Jesse says warily. "But always with 'parental supervision', alright?"

* * *

_Thursday at the Station_

By unfortunate circumstances, they meet up at the front entrance at the same time, looking away from each other and inwardly cursing at their bad luck.

Beca hastily walks toward the door, turning the knob roughly and almost running through. Jesse follows at a more leisurely pace, trying to keep as much distance between them as possible. He walks past the empty front desk and almost slams into Beca once he's through the door leading into the main room.

"Wha-"

"Watch where you're going," she snaps.

"I wasn't expecting you to slow down, sheesh," he replies. "I mean, you were practically acting like a madwoman with the way you were 'power-walking'."

"Shut up, Swanson. Just go work and try not to break anything this time," Beca tells him as she turns to walk away and into the booth.

"Talk about PMSing," he mutters. She hears him though and so she hastily turns back to face him and tell him off, but trips.

And lands on his lips.

They pull back from each other three seconds later, once they're past the shock. She's holding her hand up to her mouth like she can't believe she just accidentally smacked him and he's just…frozen. He's waited a long time to feel her lips on his again.

Well- he _used _to want her lips on his, but not anymore. And not unexpectedly; not when he hadn't even had time to savor it.

Jesse pales at his thoughts while Beca tries to regain the use of her voice. When she finally does, she lifts a shaky finger to try and point threateningly at him. "This never happened," she squeaks.

He nods…and keeps nodding as she turns and disappears into the booth.

Things just got complicated.

* * *

_Well, things sped up quicker than I thought; I guess Jesse and Beca just can't help it. Anyway, I started college again today, so I probably won't be updating as often. And if I do, it's because I'm not focusing on school work :) (which is likely to happen)_

_Review?_


	5. Confusing as Hell

Guys, I can't tell you how sorry I am. It's taken me so long to update this, so sorry! I really hope this chapter is, uh...good? Because I have no idea how it turned out the way it did and I hope it doesn't disappoint you. Well, I'll blab on below, hope you enjoy.

* * *

_**Two weeks before Regionals – Freshman Year**_

_She hasn't been to the station in two weeks. She doubts Luke really believes she has a 'long-term' stomach flu, but he has yet to call her out on it, so she'll milk it a while longer. She hasn't even been to the quad, or the pizza place on campus, where she used to go with Jesse after work. All she's done is gone to Bellas Rehearsal and classes (no, really). Beca knows she shouldn't be avoiding the issue at hand, but it's what she does best. And she really can't deal with it right now. _

_Not wanting to think about the way her stomach had plummeted down at the first brush of their lips in a fit of nerves and anticipation, she walks faster down the steps and out of the building she just had Intro to Philosophy in (and she'd been right, the class sucks)._

"_Beca!"_

_Oh, shit. She winces as she turns toward the direction his voice came from. Well she can't exactly ignore him now, can she? (And maybe she's too tired to anymore)._

_She sees Jesse run up to her, panting and placing his hands on his knees as he catches his breath. "I've been looking everywhere for you."_

"_Oh," she says tightly. "I haven't been feeling well lately, sorry."_

"_Yeah," he drawls. "Stomach flu, right? That's what Luke said."_

_Beca gives a small hum in agreement and looks over her shoulder (as if expecting someone, _anyone_, to come save her from this awkward situation), avoiding his gaze on the side of her face._

"_I'm sorry," he blurts out. She looks back at him in surprise, wincing again as she sees the sincere look on his face and the apology in his eyes, because really, he shouldn't have to be sorry (she's the one with emotional issues). _

"_I crossed a line. And that wasn't okay. I didn't know it would make you…run away," he says, looking scrutinizingly at her as he delivers the last words carefully._

_She furrows her brow anyway. "I didn't…run away." _

"_So you weren't avoiding me? I haven't caught a glimpse of you in weeks," Jesse argues. "And I know you usually skip Intro to Philosophy so wha-"_

"_I don't owe you anything," Beca snaps. _

_Jesse looks surprised at her. "I never said you did," he says slowly. "I just-" he sighs as he runs a hand through his hair, not noticing how her eyes involuntarily follow the movement. "I want to be your friend." _

_She crosses her arms and wishes for the ground to open up and swallow her whole. "Well, you're not doing a very good job of it," she mutters._

_Jesse stares at her as he opens his mouth to speak. He closes it again when he realizes no words are coming out and she feels a small smirk crawl onto her face. "It's okay, weirdo. We can just pretend it never happened. Deal?" _

_He swallows and says quietly, "Sure." _

_Beca sighs and stares at a nearby tree as she tries to think of something, anything_,_ to make Jesse feel better. After all, she is the one who didn't kiss back. "Look," she begins, trying to keep her eyes on his face as he redirects his gaze onto her instead of the building's glass doors. "I'm not…good at this. At having friends. Or…anything else," she says uncomfortably. "So, you're better off not having to deal with me, anyway. But…I can try. But I can't promise anything."_

_She lets out a relieved breath as Jesse slowly begins to grin at her. "Okay," he shrugs. "Then it's settled. We're best friends." She rolls her eyes at him but allows herself a small smile. _

_Because they're okay. They're okay again._

"_Sure, nerd. We'll be besties for life," she says sarcastically. Jesse waggles his eyebrows at her as he replies, "You might think you don't mean it. But I know, deep down, you wish for it with all your heart."_

"_Sure," Beca tells him dryly. "So what were you doing all the way on this side of campus anyway? I thought you had class." She inwardly curses as she lets it slip that she knows his schedule. Well, to be fair, he must know hers too, since he knows what building she has Intro to Philosophy in. It's clear Jesse realizes this as well, because a smug look crosses his face before he clears his throat and nonchalantly says, "Luke asked me to look for you. Says he needs you at the Station because he's short on staff." _

_Beca fails to hold in a snort. "'Staff', huh? A staff that consists of…"_

"_Me. And now you, again," Jesse grins._

"_Okay, then. I need to work anyway. That way, I don't have to go to class as much," Beca jokes (though it's partly true). Jesse smiles at her as they turn to head in the direction of the quad, in an unspoken agreement to pick up where they left off (which for her, is mixing music while Jesse watches a movie on his laptop beside her, mouthing the words and sometimes even adding in sound effects to annoy her)._

"_And I'm sorry, too. Just so you know," she says quickly, not wanting to go back to that uncomfortable topic, but still needing to show him that she really does mean it._

_She can tell he gets it when he nudges her shoulder with his and then starts babbling on about the movies he saw yesterday and how they have to catch up on her movication, before she forgets everything he's taught her (meaning, Judd Nelson's breakfast preferences and…well, that's it). _

_Yeah, they're okay._

* * *

He's doing it on purpose; she knows it.

Since the _incident, _they've taken to fighting with each other whenever they're within walking distance. He spends his shifts at work purposefully smacking the CDs unto their shelves and she spends them loudly playing music from the booth, raising the volume when he takes a break to catch up on college work, smirking at the way the muscles in his jaw flex and how freaking annoyed he always looks whenever she does this.

Sometimes, her thoughts will wander off and she'll start thinking about the way his lips had felt against hers, but then she mentally slaps herself and decides to take it out on him by making him angry again. She starts every argument, and ends them with a smirk, happily trotting back into the booth as he seethes.

This works for her. And she's happy with their newfound system, until he goes ahead and changes it.

And it confuses the hell out of her.

…

_Radio Station – Monday_

"Swanson, Ian called. He needs you to go get his lunch. He's going to drop by in twenty minutes to pick it up," she says nonchalantly.

Jesse shrugs as he reaches back toward the crate for more CDs. "That's not my job anymore. Find someone else to do it."

Beca sighs and rubs her temple exasperatedly. For once, she's not in the mood to fight. Bella rehearsal's been a pain lately, what with all the back-breaking cardio and trying to get everyone to agree on a mix for Regionals (thank goodness they got the mixer over with last week; one less thing to worry about). Plus, it seems her professors have agreed on giving out term papers all at the same time. She doesn't have time for this. "I'm just telling you what he said. Don't create problems," she tells him as she turns to disappear back into the booth.

"Me? _I'm _the one who creates problems?" He asks incredulously, stopping her in her tracks. "Do you have any idea how difficult you've been these past few weeks?"

She turns around to face him warily. "I'm not in the mood for this, Swanson. Go bother someone else."

"You're impossible," he tells her, looking at her like he's trying to figure out a difficult math problem. "I don't even know how to deal with you anymore."

Beca furrows her brow. "Nothing's changed. It's always been like this. We've always fought-"

"But you've never used to bite my head off at every possible second. We usually just avoid each other. What is with you?" He asks, putting down the CD pile he had been carrying and walking toward her, stopping a couple of paces away and crossing his arms.

"Nothing," she says crossly. "What's with _you? _Come on, what a stupid question_._"

Jesse points at her, "See? That right there. You spew direct insults at me whenever you get the chance. Ever since-" he cuts himself off as he realizes the reason for her sudden, drastic need to make him miserable. Beca glares as his face lights up and a smug smile crosses his face. "Ever since that kiss. What's wrong, Becky? Did it have such a large effect on you, you're now trying to deny your feelings for me by acting on an even sourer disposition towards me?"

"Shut up, Swanson," she snarls. "And if that's what you call a kiss, then I feel truly sorry for your girlfriends."

Jesse chuckles, "Trust me, there are no complaints on that end. But don't try to change the subject. Do I make you nervous, Mitchell?" He steps closer to her and grins as she steps back nervously. "I _do._"

"You're an idiot," she snaps. She will not admit that kiss affected her in any way. Because it didn't. In any way. Ever.

She hates him.

Jesse sobers up as buries his hands in his pockets, studying her curiously. "You never answered the question. Do I make you nervous?" He asks again.

"Do I?" Beca counters, trying to gain back some leverage. He stares at her and she stares back.

"Sometimes."

Beca gaps at him. "Wha- what?" she stutters.

He continues to gaze at her seriously. "Sometimes…you make me nervous." He shrugs and nods his head at her as if saying, "Your turn."

She eyes him and shakes her head, taking a step back and saying, "Go back to work, Swanson."

"Can't you ever be honest with yourself?"

"You don't know anything about me, so don't act like you do," she seethes.

"Prove it then."

Now she's confused. "What?"

"Prove that I don't make you nervous." And in less than two seconds, he's closed the distance between them, gripping her hips and pushing her against the booth door. She can only gawk at him as he leans down to her face, enough to brush his nose against hers, and looks down intently at her. "Prove it," he whispers.

Beca wants to push him away, she does. She wants to punch him in the gut and then maybe his face for daring to do this to her. Instead, she finds herself wondering where in the _hell _he even got the balls to initiate the first close, physical contact they've had in over a year, and _why_.

The worst part is, she can feel herself flushing and finding it harder to breathe with each passing second. She resists the urge to close her eyes, instead choosing not to look away from his, because she _will not _back down.

"You're blushing," he says softly, his breath brushing across her lips. She swallows hard and tilts her head up in a challenge (though she does so carefully, because their mouths are dangerously close).

"That doesn't mean anything. It's a natural reaction," she says calmly. He smirks and she inwardly curses him, because she knows he's taken it the completely wrong way. He thinks it's a natural reaction to _him_. _Unlikely._ Though, Jesse is good-looking. But that's not anything new; she's always known this. But up close, it's even clearer-

_Fuck. What is she thinking?_

Beca jumps as she feels his fingers run along her hips, tickling the skin that peeks out from between her shirt and jeans. "Don't do that," she says shakily, not taking her eyes from his.

"Why?" he murmurs, eying her knowingly. Damn it, he's not going to let this go. Not until she says it.

"Fine," she grits out. "You make me nervous. _You make me nervous, okay?_" Her hands are gripping his upper arms as she says it, not knowing whether her body's instinct is to push him away or pull him closer. But she won't go back there. Back to him. Not when it had gone _so well _the first time.

Jesse loosens his hold on her and she forces herself to feel relieved. She sees him gulp and look down at her, not completely pulling away yet. "Okay," he responds softly, referring to her confession.

"Okay," she says, letting out a breath. They both straighten up as he backs away, clearing his throat and turning back toward the crate of CDs. She slips into the booth behind her and takes a deep breath after shutting the door.

She doesn't even pay attention to Ian when he comes in five minutes later and complains about his missing lunch, shrieking when Jesse tells him about the 'rogue freshman that came in and stole it right off the table'.

She still has no clue what the hell just happened.

* * *

_Sorority Mixer – Thursday Night_

"Why are we here again?" Beca asks, bored out of her mind.

Alex stands next to her, scanning the crowd for a frat boy who doesn't completely fit into the fraternity stereotype. "No such luck," she mutters. "Something about 'checking out the competition'," Alex says in reply to Beca's question. "I think Stacie wanted Lian and Kristen to see how the Trebles perform, so that they would have an idea of what the competition was like. I'm surprised you didn't think of it first, actually." She looks at her friend questioningly as she tries to smooth over her wild curls.

Beca shrugs, "I've been trying to avoid thinking about anything that has to do with a Treble. I didn't even know they were going to perform tonight." She glances around the party warily, as if expecting a guy in a maroon hoodie to jump out unexpectedly.

"They are annoying," Alex muses. "But it's weird you didn't know. I think the whole gaggle of sorority girls have been bragging about how the 'hot' Trebles were going to perform at their party. _Gag, _much?"

Beca hums in agreement and frowns into her cup as her stomach plummets. Damn it, this reaction is far too associated with _him_. She doesn't want to see him; not when she's been doing such a good job of avoiding him. Even though Ian's pissed at her for missing two shifts already, she'd rather take his dramatics than have to see Swanson again.

Fat Amy struts up to them with Jessica in tow, throwing her arms around Beca and Alex. "The show is about to start, ladies," she whispers conspirationally.

Alex laughs, "I hope one of them trips off the stage. Maybe Aaron? Oh, please let it be Aaron."

Jessica chuckles, "What do you have against that guy?"

"He once accused me of stealing his hat," Alex says incredulously. "As if I had nothing better to do. Honestly."

"And did you?" Beca smirks.

Alex sniffs. "Of course. I was bored," she smiles smugly, making the four of them laugh. A sorority girl looks over her shoulder at them and lifts her index finger to her lips, making the universal 'quiet, damn it' sign. They raise their eyebrows at her and begrudgingly look toward the stage, where a group of guys in maroon, button-up shirts are currently lining up.

Beca smiles and waves back at Benji, who's just noticed her on the side of the open deck. She's always liked Benji and the way the kid gets excited over practically everything. He's a good optimist to her pessimist. The only downside to her friendship with him is the fact that he's one of Jesse's closest friends. Same thing with Donald. In fact, for two people who try to have as little to do with each other as possible, she and Jesse have too many things linking them together (their job, their hobbies, their _friends_ for Pete's sake). And there's no way _she's_ giving them up so…

She'll just have to deal.

Beca quickly looks down toward her cup when she sees Jesse glance at Benji and scan the crowd. She can feel his eyes on her and her scowl deepens. Beca grits her jaw as she looks back up and sees him staring at her with an unreadable expression on his face. Then, one side of his mouth tilts up and he's suddenly smirking at her.

What. The. Heck.

She resists the urge to cover her ears when the sorority girls start squealing as soon as the music starts. Oh, great. _The Wanted._ Very nice, Swanson. Very original. Beca sips from her cup as Unicycle starts the first verse, lifting up his shirt to show off his abs (no surprise, really, but the amount of girls that squeal is insane). She looks over worriedly at Alex when she hears her let out a small 'eep' of her own. The curly haired girl shrugs guiltily at her and Beca smiles (she knows the girl's a sucker for abs). And then Swanson takes over.

_I wanna put my hands on her hands_

_Feel the heat from her skin__  
Get reckless in the starlight  
_

Why is he looking at her? Is he? Yup. Yup, he's looking directly at her. She's not the only one who notices; Fat Amy's raising her eyebrows and side-eying the hell out of her right now.

_I'm moving to the beat of her heart  
I was so lost until tonight, tonight_

That…was that a hip swivel? Aimed in her direction? A subtle one nonetheless, but still…she feels herself flush. Damn him. What the hell is he doing? Why is he running his hand down his chest? That's really ho- no. No. It's not. Well, according to the high-pitched squeals that are currently damaging her eardrums, it kind of is, but-

_The night is getting colder  
And I can't come off this high  
I don't want this here to end  
I know she feels the same  
Cause I can see it in her eyes  
She says can we start again_

She doesn't even notice they're halfway through the song because she's been watching him. He hasn't taken his eyes off of hers the whole time and when he starts singing again, he continues his very direct…flirting. That's what it is, right? But…maybe it's not even for her, maybe-

Her mouth dries as she watches Jesse run his hand through his hair. And she licks her lips involuntarily as she notices the skin peeking from beneath the top button he always leaves undone. Her eyes snap back to his and he gives her a smug smile that makes his jawline look _so-_

Damn that jawline.

Before she knows it, the song's ended and the Trebles are making their way down the stage, sorority girls surrounding them immediately. She feels Amy's gaze on the side of her face and realizes just how lucky she is to have had her friend distract the others from noticing the heated glances Jesse kept giving her. _What's he playing at?_

"Pssst, Shawshank," Fat Amy whispers. "You need me to create a distraction so you can take your boy toy and go release some tension?"

Beca looks incredulously at her and quickly shakes her head. "No thank you, Amy. I'm- I'm going to leave, okay? Take over for me and make sure everyone gets back to their dorms safely, please," she says, looking over worriedly at a drunken Stacie dancing in between two guys.

"You got it, boss," Fat Amy salutes her. Beca waves bye at her and walks briskly toward the exit. She needs to leave; she needs to _breathe_.

She leans back against the brick wall outside the house, furrowing her brow and wondering why in the hell Swanson would do something like that. She straightens up as she realizes that he's just trying to throw her off her game. Trying to distract her. Beca huffs at the ridiculousness of it all. And she _responded_. She should have looked away, should have paid him no mind. Well, _damn him_.

She can play his game, too.

* * *

_Ahem._

_So, 'I Found You' was a song request by Itllneverhappenagain (not sure if it was what you were expecting, but I tried :( )_

_And uh...well, whatever requests you guys have or any ideas, feel free to tell me about them and if they go with the story, then I'll put them in :)_

_Again, hope the chapter turned out okay... And thank you guys for reading!_

_Not sure if it's too much to ask, but... Review?_


	6. Lies, lies, all lies

I don't even know how to apologize anymore...

College sucks, guys.

* * *

_**Three days before Regionals**_

"_You're a relentless kid, you know that?"_

_Jesse resists the urge to smack his boss upside the head, because really? Luke just realizes this, now?_

"_Look, all I'm saying is to give it a chance. I've listened to it before and it's awesome, really."_

_Luke scrutinizes him while glancing back at Beca's hard drives all huddled up in the submission box. The annoying Brit with the unimpressive six-pack (or at least that's what Jesse likes to think of it as) heaves a big sigh and nods his head. "Fine. I'll listen to it, but not anytime soon. I'm busy," Luke says dismissively as Jesse's face falls._

"_Yeah, well, I'll just keep on bugging you until you do," Jesse mutters as he eyes Luke's retreating form. How selfish can someone be to not want to give five minutes of their day to hear a mix? Freaking Luke. If his life were a movie (and he's trying really hard to make it one), that Brit would be the Dr. Octopus to his Spiderman, the Magneto to his Professor Xavier, the Lex Luther to his Superman, the-_

"_Why are you standing like that, you weirdo?"_

_He freezes in his 'I am Superman' pose, hands on hips and chest puffed out, and winces as he prays, _pleads, _to the movie Gods for Beca Mitchell to not be standing behind him, witnessing his completely dorky moment (one that does not happen often…ahem). _

_He turns around slowly, trying to keep his face neutral, taking in her relaxed posture; backpack slung over one shoulder and an attractive smirk on her face. _

_Jesse clears his throat, "Hey, Bec. What's up?"_

"_Not much. I'd rather hear what's going on with you, though," she says amused. "Save the world lately?"_

_He puts a hand to his heart and pretends to swoon (he gets over embarrassing moments easily…it's a skill he's perfected). "Are you referring to the superhero marathon we had last week? I'm so proud."_

_Beca puts on an annoyed scowl and rolls her eyes. "How would I know? I fell asleep after the first five minutes," she says, ignoring his scandalized face. "Your movication's more like 'nap time'."_

_His face turns smug. "I might have figured out a solution to that never-ending problem. Benji has this cool magic device thing that sends a shock through you, so we could try tha-"_

"_And I'd punch you," she narrows her eyes at him._

_Jesse scoffs, "You? With that tiny hand of yours?"_

"_You'd be surprised," Beca smiles smugly. _

_He eyes her suspiciously, muttering, "I don't want to know." It sounds scary._

"_Want to skip?"_

"_What?" He asks surprised. Beca's glancing between the crate of CDs and the booth, where Luke's currently talking on the phone and lazing about. Jesse resists the urge to call him out on it. Busy, his ass._

"_Let's skip. I don't feel like working today; rehearsal's been a bitch lately, and so has Aubrey," he hears her mutter. "So let's go hang at the quad or something."_

_He may or may not be jumping for joy on the inside. This is the first time she's invited him to tag along, instead of him having to just do it himself without her input, and this means progress. Yes, the failed kiss from a month ago should have been enough of an incentive to give up on the idea of getting to that point with Beca. But he's never given up easily before, and he's not going to do it now._

_So by the time they reach the quad, and he's trying to tone down the excited look on his face (which is completely noticeable since Beca's eying him oddly), he curses the fact that Aubrey Posen just happens to walk by and backtracks when she sees them. Bumper's made it very clear that he should stay away from the controlling Bella captain, but luck's never been on his side. He tries not to shuffle nervously as he hears Beca's muffled curse when the blonde starts storming towards them._

"_This is just freaking, effing great," Beca mumbles._

_Aubrey stops at about five feet from them, and he tries not to back away instinctively at the rage on her face. "Beca," she snaps. "Can I talk to you for a moment?" The words sound like they're carved out through gritted teeth and he's never been more afraid in his life._

_Jesse glances at Beca, who wears a bored look and just stares back at Aubrey nonchalantly. He notices the locked jaw, though, and knows this won't end well. "What?" Beca asks. And Jesse cringes at the sweet tone, because if he knows one thing, Beca is never sweet. This is bad. _

"_We need to talk. Privately. Now," Aubrey's words never lose their cutting edge. Even worse, the blonde's glare is now directed onto him. _

_Jesse watches Beca worriedly as she rubs her temples and tries to breathe in calmly. He should try to get her out of this, but his involvement would probably make things worse. He feels like he's going to suffocate between them, the air thick and the tension coming off in waves._

"_I'll be back," Beca mutters as she walks past him and follows Aubrey to a nearby tree. He opens his mouth to protest (the blonde might have a murderous intent and he's terrified for her), but she gives him a reassuring glance, something in her eyes telling him that it's better to listen to whatever Aubrey has to say (or yell out) before the blonde explodes. So he tries to wait patiently while watching them 'talk it out'. There's a lot of infuriated pointing (mostly at him) and the blonde's face cannot get any redder, but Beca just stares back calmly, and he has a feeling everything is going in one ear and then out the other. But he does notice the small furrow in her brow and the twitching hand that probably wants to form into a fist (she definitely wasn't kidding about the punching thing). _

_After about six whole minutes (and he's counted), Aubrey storms off and Beca walks back over, fists clenched and a strained look on her face. Her posture's all tense and he hates the fact that it's so different from the relaxed slouch from before. _

"_Is everything okay?" He asks hesitantly. He needs to thread carefully if he wants some answers. _

"_Yeah. Peachy." And with Beca it's sometimes impossible to get them._

"_You sure? You don't want to talk about what just…" he gestures with his hand to the spot beneath the tree. _

"_Nope. Let's go," Beca says as she turns to walk away._

_Jesse runs a hand through his hair and lets out a puff of air as he starts to follow her, noticing the squared shoulders and the footsteps that sound more like stomps. "Hey," he says softly, catching her attention. "Want to see what's on your Movication list for next week?" He chuckles when he sees her roll her eyes. Little by little, Beca eases back into a relaxed walk and they fall into one of their random conversations. Jesse gives her a genuine smile once he sees that she's reverted back to her sarcastic quips and smirks. It's so much better than the strained smiles from before; he doesn't want to see those again. _

_He should have intervened._

* * *

He doesn't know what made him do it.

It's like his body had been on autopilot. It felt like the moment he'd touched the skin of her hips, it had left him with five-degree burns, his fingers still tingling even days after the dangerously close encounter they'd had at the station.

He'd wanted to mess with her; try to leave his mark like she's left hers on him. Because even after a year, she still has the capacity to leave his mind in a state of goo, trying so hard to remember why she's not good for him.

So he doesn't understand why it feels like he's still waiting for her. Or an explanation.

Just waiting for…something.

...

**A week after – At the Station**

Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays.

Should these days even exist? Because right now they're the bane of his existence. He's never hated a job so much in his life.

Beca doesn't look at him anymore; doesn't even acknowledge the fact that he's there; in the next room, or carrying a crate of CD's into the booth and organizing them slowly; oh so slowly, just to see if she'll give in and spare him a glance. But she doesn't.

And it's not like Jesse's going to apologize. No matter how 'uncomfortable' his performance at the sorority mixer made her. But she's acting like he doesn't even exist and it's kind of pissing him off. If anything, he expected that day to incite a spark in her or something. Because that's how they work. He pushes, she pushes back ten times harder. He teases, she teaches him not to mess with her (though this knowledge doesn't stay in his head for long before he does it again).

He picks a fight with her, she's supposed to respond. Not take it in stride and act like their rivalry, or antagonism toward each other, whatever the hell it is, is one-sided. Because if it is, then he's been living in a fantasy world inside his head for the last freaking year. And that's highly improbable. Even for him (he may be obsessed with movies, but he's not going to make one up inside his head…nope).

So what the hell's going on? It's making Jesse want to rip his hair out. Beca's supposed to _react_. This'll make him retaliate. And they'll keep going until the bubble of tension and anger explodes so that they could start all over again. This is what works for them. And it pisses him off that an uncomfortable knot forms in his stomach at the thought of her cutting off all interaction (even if it's negative) with him just because he'd pushed too hard. Even if it's just fighting or spitting words out, he needs it.

Because resentful glares, scowls and smirks are better than nothing at all. And Jesse needs them. He hates this.

He's brought out of his musings as he hears soft footsteps walk through the front entrance, immediately straightening up and glancing at Beca from the corner of his eye.

She walks in casually, making her way into the booth…not shooting Jesse a single look, or even a snide smile.

And he grits his teeth.

* * *

**Day of Riff-Off - Friday**

"I thought you had to work," Jesse says surprised as he opens the door for Donald.

"What? Not happy to see me, Honey?" Donald chuckles as he reaches over to clap his friend's shoulder. "Thought I'd drop by and watch the show tonight. It's been a while."

"Sure has, man," Jesse smiles. "You've disappeared on us."

Donald grimaces. "Work's a bitch. How I ended up in Human Resources, I'll never know."

"Dude!" A mop of curly hair comes into view…on a unicycle.

Donald sighs and drags his hand down his face. "I thought we'd gotten him to grow out of that thing."

"Yeah, well, old habits die hard," Jesse shakes his head.

"I know you guys are talking about me. And I'll have you know, this is the most efficient way to get around campus. And you're all just jealous," Unicycle states proudly.

Donald and Jesse glance at each other before turning back to Unicycle and nodding seriously before he wheels himself into the living room. Might as well just agree with the kid, you know? It's easier.

"Can't wait to see the show tonight. It's always a pretty close call, huh?" Jesse frowns slightly at Donald's seemingly innocent question. The Rip-Offs do get pretty competitive, but it's mostly between him and Beca. And he's not sure if she'll even bother to try and challenge him tonight.

Pretty soon, Jesse's blinking owlishly at the fingers snapping in front of his face. Donald's staring at him with an arched brow and a smirk. His friend might know him too well. Jesse narrows his eyes at his observant former-teammate and tries to shrug it off as no big deal.

It doesn't work.

"So did you just get to campus?" Jesse changes the subject, ignoring Donald's reproachful look.

"Nope," Donald drawls. "I got in two hours earlier. Went to have lunch with Beca," he continues, studying Jesse from the corner of his eye. "We had a lot to catch up on. Though she's been sort of quiet, don't you think?"

Jesse huffs, "It's a nice change, though." _Lie._

"But," Donald begins casually. "She probably has a lot on her mind. With work and the Bellas and _work_. How's that going by the way?"

"You're not subtle," Jesse turns to give him an unamused smile.

"Just wondering," Donald shrugs. "You've been off lately. And so has Bec," Donald says matter-of-factly, not noticing how Jesse cringes at the familiar nickname.

The Treble captain gives a noncommittal hum. "We stress each other out. You know that. Nothing out of the ordinary." _Lie._

Donald stays quiet for a moment, lips pursed, before nodding his head and picking up his bag to start walking up the stairs to the second floor of the Treble House.

Jesse nods and pretends to pay attention once Donald starts telling him about a funny office story at work.

But his mind's on Beca. These days, it's always on Beca.

…

"Oh great, I keep forgetting we don't have Justin with us anymore. That new dude from Hood Night better not run this thing," Brandon frowns as he climbs down the ladder and into the pool.

Jesse shrugs as he adjusts his coat; it's damn freezing. "All he has to do is spin the wheel. There aren't exactly high risks of him messing it up," he responds as he nods up at Donald who's sitting on top of the edge of the pool. Jesse turns to watch amusedly as he sees a sullen Unicycle follow Kolio down into the pool. They'd managed to convince him to leave his one-wheeler at home. At least they're getting somewhere.

Jesse checks on Ethan, Sheba, Ron, and Brian, the four of whom are looking around the empty pool deck cautiously, as if they're expecting the other groups to full on attack them with some unexpected a-capella duets. The new guys are cool, but they still have to get used to their new environment and get comfortable.

He sees Aaron stare over at the ladder and looks over his shoulder to watch the Bellas climb down the steps slowly, laughing and goofing off. Stacie smacks each of the new girl's butts, as per tradition before their first Rip-Off. Jesse frowns sympathetically at Aaron when he sees the brunette, who almost always sports his maroon hat backwards, struggle to keep his eyes from straying over to the curly-haired sophomore Bella. Alex, Jesse thinks. He doesn't really make it his priority to remember the younger girls' names, but the fact that one of the Trebles has an obvious crush on her helps.

Unfortunately for Jesse, he doesn't have enough willpower to look away as he sees Beca coming down the steps and wave to Donald and Benji, who's just made it into the pool and smiles back at her.

Jesse purses his lips tightly as he unwillingly waits for the competitive smile that's not going to come his way, if this last week's anything to go by.

So, he's surprised when Beca not only turns to looks directly at him, but when she also gets a gleam in her eye and the corners of her lips tilt up. It's not her usual smirk and this confuses him. But this is the first time she's acknowledged him voluntarily in a while and he'll take what he can get. Jesse stares right back at her, accepting…whatever it is she's trying to convey with that almost smile.

It's a challenge. It always is.

Their gazes only break away when they hear a squeaky voice come through the microphone. "Okay, so," the kid who played the bad boy band music on Hood Night begins. "Let's get this started. Um, the prize is…a free dinner at the local pizza diner," he says, furrowing his brow as he reaches his hand into his pocket and takes out a crumple sheet of yellowish paper. "Yup, that's it. But it's good pizza, so…okay. You guys know the rules, right? 'Cause I don't…" Well, now Jesse's glad he'd gotten to quickly explain the event to the new guys, or else they'd be completely lost. "Anyway, the first category is…" The Trebles', Bellas', BU Harmonics', and High Notes' (mainly unfocused) gazes are riveted on the spinning wheel. "The Judd's." The short kid jumps back as Jessica immediately runs to the center, barely beating a BU Harmonic on the way.

"_Friday finally came around, this girl's ready to," _she barely gets to belt out the lyrics, the Trebles watching in surprise as Sheba steps up to 'cut her off'.

"_-To the light rain, beating on the tin roof, baby, just me and you, rocking with the rhythm of the rain, slide on over," _The Trebles try hard to keep up with the background notes, because the Judd's are challenging enough as it is. "_Baby-"_

"_Baby it's just you I'm thinking of, well you know I can be found," _A BU Harmonic girl steps up, cutting Sheba off with a dismissive wave of her hand._ "__Sitting home all alone, if you can't come around," _her voice gets significantly quieter as she realizes that she doesn't know the rest of the lyrics and the Trebles smirk. This round goes to them.

"Okay, you're_ cut off. _Trebles win this round," Shorty (it's what Jesse will call him for now) says. "Next category…songs about…sex."

Unsurprisingly, Stacie's the first one at the center._ "__I wanna lock you up in my closet when no one's around, I wanna put your hand in my pocket because you're allowed, I wanna drive you into the corner and kiss you, without a sound-" _

Everyone laughs when Unicycle runs up and starts singing,_ "__I walk on by, girls be looking like damn he fly, I pimp to the beat, walking down the street in my new lafreak, yeah. This is how I roll, animal print pants out control. It's Redfoo with the big ass 'fro, and like Bruce Leroy I got the glow, yo (Ahhh) Girl look at that body," _Uni continues, while thrusting his hips like in the video, the Trebles backing him up while simultaneously trying to keep from bursting into laughter.

Jesse thinks they're on a roll until Unicycle reaches the_ "__I'm sexy and I know it" _part, with a sweet voice cutting him off by the second verse. His head whips around to stare at Beca, who's just knowingly started their game.

_"__Sexy silk, Wrap me around, 'round, 'round, 'round. I'll be your pussycat licking at your milk, Right now down, down, down. Oh, a kiss can last all night! You'll have to seduce me, nibble and bite,"_ He tries not to shudder at the suggestive tone in her voice, instead choosing to gaze coolly back at her while she smirks and sings along with Cynthia Rose, who's voice is a nice touch to the song's seductive edge. Beca raises her eyebrows at him, daring him to get it together and meet her head on.

Well, it's his turn now.

"_Say 'yeah, yeah, yeah' you're-"_

Jesse walks up to the center, cutting her off and getting closer than necessary, smiling at her glare. "_You're on fire. When you roll it, I can't control it, And when you throw it, It's hard to catch it, And when you shake it, I pray you don't break it, And when you drop it, girl I cannot take it. Something about the way you move, sweat is dripping all over you-"_

To say he gets flustered when she steps closer to him, enough to feel her breath on his lips as she looks up at him and cuts him off, is an understatement. "_You and I'm sorry, I'm a keep playing these cats out like Atari, High heeled shoes getting love from the dudes, Four bad ass chicks from the Moulin Rouge.  
Hey sisters, soul sisters, Better get that dough sisters…" _They win that round, but it's not unexpected if the dazed look in his eyes is anything to go by.

"And this one goes to the Bellas," Shorty gestures at the group of girls wearing grins of satisfaction, after Beca sings the ten verses without getting cut off. "The High Notes haven't participated 'til now, so you guys are cut off," he tells the groups lying on the floor, all of whom couldn't possibly care less. "Let's see…next category…songs Glee ruined."

This one's for him.

And he tells himself the song he chooses means nothing. _Lie._

"_Now and then I think of when we were together, Like when you said you felt so happy you could die. I told myself that you were right for me, But felt so lonely in your company, But that was love and it's an ache I still remember," _he sings while staring straight at Beca. They don't move from their spots at the center, even when they don't really have a reason to be so up close and personal.

_"__But you didn't have to cut me off," _he continues, making it obvious that this has nothing to do with their game anymore._ "__Make it like it never happened and that we were nothing. I don't even need your love, but you-"_

_"__You keep passing me by, We're just wasting time, Trying to prove who's right, And if it all goes crashing into the sea. If it's just you and me, Trying to find the light_," she stares stonily at him, not caring that the song's not even in the category, just wanting to shoot some hurtful lyrics back at him. _"__We're just fumbling through the grey, Trying to find a heart that's not walking away," _And it works.

Beca stops there as she nods at Shorty who's just opened his mouth to say something. "I know. Cut off. But worth it," she mutters as she sees Jesse's frown. This hadn't been what he'd expected tonight. But he supposes he's to blame for the serious turn their game had taken.

So he feels numb as the Trebles 'whoop' and clap him on the back for their win, trying to ignore Donald's intent gaze on the side of his face from the top of the pool, and instead choosing to watch Beca as she gives the rest of the Bellas an apologetic grimace. Her friends just shrug carelessly and grin reassuringly at her.

He tells himself it means nothing when she doesn't even look back at him before climbing out of the pool. _It's a lie. _

* * *

A/N:

Thank you to everyone who gave me suggestions for songs! Sorry if I couldn't use one of yours, but they had to fit; maybe in another chapter :) (The Riff-Off, by the way? Freakishly hard to write, especially with the categories. Props to anyone who's written them. You're awesome).

Song recommendations:

_Moulin Rouge_ and _Hot _- by alreadytorn (who keeps coming up with awesome suggestions)

_Sexy Silk - _by Guest (loved this one, by the way)

If you're interested, I signed up on photobucket, to make FC's (faceclaims) for the new Bellas, recommended by _ingeniousmacabre. _So you can check out the link on my profile.

Other unimportant details...

_Well...my personal playlist for this fic is actually, _Ships in the Night _by_ Mat Kearney.

I think it just describes Beca and Jesse's relationship perfectly in this story.

_So...review?_


	7. UST

Please don't kill me. Please don't kill me. Please don't kill me. Please don't kill me.

I had this chapter about half-way done before I got sick and then I couldn't do much after that. But hopefully this chapter makes up for the long wait.

* * *

_**Day of Regionals – Back on Campus**_

_She stares at him and he stares back._

_Her dad's car is driving off already, leaving them behind. She's glad. The tense atmosphere and being so close to her angry father was killing her. But now she's in another damn situation. Beca can admit she may have overreacted a bit back at the Police Department. After all, Jesse had only been trying to help. But now things with her dad are messy, well messier than they already were, and she can't help but be angry with him over that._

"_Well, bye," Beca says monotonously as she moves to walk around him and back to her dorm. _

"_Wait, Beca," Jesse pleads, reaching for her arm and letting go when she shrugs him off. "Come on, Bec. I'm sorry. But who else was I supposed to call?"_

_She whirls around and glares at his glum face. "Anyone," she seethes. "Anyone else."_

"_Who else would pay bail for you?" Jesse reasons. "I don't have that kind of money; if I did, you know I would have done it in a heartbeat. But no college kid has that kind of money to spare. There was nothing else for me to do, Bec."_

"_You could have let me spend the night in jail," she throws her hands up. "Anything other than my dad. You know what our relationship is like."_

_He does. It only took a random, unplanned meeting at the quad and an introduction to realize that Beca never had any intention of him meeting her father. Jesse had first worried that it was because she thought him unlikeable or maybe just not important enough to introduce to any family member, but a look at the tight-lipped smiles and strained conversation between Beca and her dad quickly refuted that idea. Beca does not get along with her father. And it probably ties back to some childhood issues that he has no business prying into. _

But who else was he supposed to call?

"_I'm sorry," he says helplessly. There's nothing he can do. She's going to stay angry at him, no matter how many times he apologizes, and that hurts almost as much as her telling him he's not her boyfriend. _

"_I know," Beca mutters with a furrowed brow. She just wants this conversation to be over. She wants to go to bed and try to forget about all of it. About the fact that her relationship with Jesse, the one person she didn't want to screw things up with, is now pulled taut, almost stretched to its limit and she doesn't know how to fix it. She rubs her eyes as she goes to walk around him again, passing by him with barely a glance._

"_I didn't mean to hurt you," he says softly, remembering the far-away look in her eyes after she stopped trying to reason with her dad; the awkward silence that had surrounded the three of them as Beca kept her stare on the dashboard. _

_Beca stops mid-step, looking over her shoulder to give Jesse an uneasy smile. "I know."_

I didn't mean to hurt you, either.

* * *

See, here's the thing.

She is…confused. That did not go as planned.

It was supposed to have gone like this: Beca ignores Jesse. Jesse gets confused and maybe even pissed (because neither of them likes to be ignored). Jesse does not expect Beca to fight back on night of Riff-Off. Jesse too stunned to do much. Jesse flustered. Beca wins. Yay for Beca.

Except it had gone like this: Beca ignores Jesse. Jesse gets confused and pissed (progress). Jesse does not expect Beca to fight back on night of Riff-Off (progress continues). Jesse stunned, but gives as good as he gets (progress stops). Jesse flustered (progress back on). Jesse starts communicating with her through lyrics (progress stops and heads downhill). Beca fights back and tries not to choke up (mission aborted). Beca gets 'cut-off', so Beca loses (explosion). Beca hates the look on his face (it's always a damn rollercoaster with him). Boo for Beca.

So now she feels guilty and sad and vengeful and hurt and angry. Too many feelings. Always involving him. She shouldn't feel guilty; he's as much to blame as her and she will not let Jesse turn this around on her. She hates feeling sad because it's not worth it; there's nothing to fix. Revenge, she will gladly seek. The hurt, she can't do anything about. The anger, she can work with.

It's what she's been using as fuel for this long, anyway.

…

_Radio Station – Monday_

She's ten minutes late, but it's better this way. She needs to measure his reaction to her. It's what'll initiate whatever plan she has to make up in less than thirty seconds.

His back is turned when she walks in through the doorway, but that doesn't mean she misses the way his shoulders stiffen up and then forcibly slump down into a more relaxed posture. Okay, good. Apparently, her presence still has an effect on him. This works in her favor. She has nothing to lose. It's not like he has an effect on her, too.

No way, dude.

She starts walking forward, toward the booth. At the last second, right as she's passing him and before she can talk herself out of it, Beca lifts her hand to run it along his shoulder blade slowly, her index finger on the nape of his neck. "Hi, Swanson," she says softly and then continues on her merry way. From the corner of her eye, she sees his head snap toward her in disbelief, but she's already inside the booth, closing the door on his gaping face.

Huh. Not bad (pat on the back for Beca).

…

She's in the middle of playing Track 4 when she sees Jesse glance back at her from where he's stacking CDs on the shelf. He's been doing this for the last ten minutes and she's pretty damn proud of herself for making him this flustered, but there's only so much she can get done with his eyes on her. Beca adjusts the headphones around her ears and looks up to meet his gaze, raising an eyebrow at him. Jesse frowns as his cheeks flush and quickly looks back toward the album in his hand. She lets out a small laugh and shifts her concentration back onto the program on her laptop.

A few minutes later, she looks at the big ass clock on the wall and decides it's time to have a little fun again. Beca skips _(not literally, she has some pride)_ out of the booth and scowls when she doesn't see Jesse near the shelves. _Where did that nerd go?_

"Looking for me, Mitchell?" She whirls around and tries not to let out a gasp when she finds him closer than she'd expected.

Jesse arches a brow at her and slightly tilts his head. "Everything okay?"

Beca nods and bites her tongue when she sees the smug look in his eye. Of course he isn't going to let her get away with her stunt from earlier. Well, she always rises up to meet the challenge, right? "Oh, I'm fine. Are _you _okay? You look a bit flushed; are you getting sick?" She moves forward to lay her hand on his chest, looking at him with a worried expression that loses all credibility with the mocking glint in her eye.

"I'm fine," Jesse murmurs as his eyes shift between her face and the finger now grazing the silver of skin peeking from beneath top button he always leaves undone.

"Good," Beca smirks as she gives his chest two firm pats. "Then mind getting me lunch? I'm starved. Thanks." She turns around and walks back into the booth, her hand giving him a backwards wave.

And once again she closes the door on his gaping face.

She's having so much fun.

…

"Yes, Ian. Everything's fine."

"Are you sure? Nothing's on fire? The desk still retains its innocence?"

"When are you going to get it through your giant head that that rule will never be at risk of getting broken with us?" Beca tells him exasperatedly through the phone tucked in between her ear and shoulder.

"Right," Ian scoffs. "As if. I am not blind, Beca. I know what UST is."

"UST?" She asks as she frowns at the CD she's examining in her hand. _The Breakfast Club. _Ugh.

"Unresolved Sexual Tension."

Beca almost loses her grip on the case, opening her mouth to tell her darling boss off, but instead she ends up choking when her windpipe is suddenly blocked. "Well, that just proves my theory," Ian says when he hears her coughing through the phone. "You don't have to act so surprised. I know how much you want that hunk of a man. It's okay, Beca. _I know._" She wants to kill Ian. And this conversation reminds her way too much of the one she had last week with another meddling friend of hers.

"_So what's it like having a room all to yourself?"_

_Beca shrugs and moves her straw more forcibly through her much too frozen chocolate shake. "It's okay… Honestly, it's kind of lonely. Especially because you don't forget a roommate like Amy, but I guess the privacy is nice."_

_Donald gives a small hum and raises an eyebrow at her. When all he gets in response is a perplexed arch of the brow, he gives a frustrated sigh. "Ever use that privacy for more _personal _issues?" He elaborates. "Like working out some…tension?"_

"_What?" Beca asks slowly. "Dude, what are you talking about?"_

_Her friend with the hipster glasses throws his head back at the sky, as if he has no more prayers for her. "I'm talking about Jesse! Swanson! Whatever you call him. I mean, you have your own room now. Isn't that enough of an incentive to invite him over and do what you crazy kids have wanted to do for over a year now?"_

_Beca can only gap at him. _

"_Come on, Beca! Everyone can see it. Why do you two keep on wasting time?"_

"_What the hell, Donald!" She snaps once she gains back use of her vocal chords. "That doesn't make any sense. We hate each other. What the hell." She sits back and narrows her eyes at him as she takes more forceful sips of her drink. _Damn it, why won't it melt?

"_You don't fool me. Neither of you. I know, Bec. _I know."

"_You're a weird one, Donny."_

Once she starts breathing properly again, she walks back over to the desk chair and takes a seat as she prepares for the small minded discussion ahead of her. "You're wrong. There is nothing between me and Jess- Swanso- whatever."

"Okay," Ian drawls. "Sure. Let's go with that. Let's pretend the air around you two doesn't _sizzle_ with repressed feelings and misunderstandings. Let's pretend you don't want to throw him down onto that precious desk and-"

"Stop! That- don't- ugh," she sputters. "You're wrong. All of you are wrong," she says, referring to her other friends' misguided perceptions, remembering the look Fat Amy had given her after the Riff-Off.

"All of us? You mean the voices in your head telling you to shove your tongue down his throat and-"

"I'm hanging up now. Goodbye." She ends the call and winces, knowing she's going to get hell for it later. Ian's just dramatic that way and he'll want to talk her ear off with a discussion on _proper manners_ and _etiquette_.

Beca sighs as she reaches for her headphones and prepares to go back on air. But she can only stiffen up as she hears the booth door open and resist the urge to turn her head to the side and look at him.

"Got your lunch," he sets the bag down in front of her and she raises her eyebrows at the logo of the pizza place they used to frequent in freshman year. _So, he remembers. Well…that's interesting. _But she didn't expect him to actually get her lunch either- her eyes widen as she feels his breath down the nape of her neck _(why did she wear a bun, again?)_. She's not facing him but she can feel his body heat near her back and it's enough to unnerve her.

The chair's suddenly spun towards him and Beca feels quite proud of herself for holding in her squeak, but it's hard to keep her face expressionless once she meets his eyes. Jesse's looking at her intently, almost searchingly, and it's giving him the upper hand. She doesn't like it.

He's bracing his hands on the arms of the seat and his face is level with hers. "What are you doing?"

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" Beca answers as she eyes the flexed biceps on either side of her. _Nerds shouldn't have muscles._

"_I _got you lunch. _I _was just doing my job. _You_, however, are trying to start something you don't have the guts to finish," he says, his eyes boring into hers.

Beca narrows her eyes at him. "Excuse me?"

"The touching. It needs to stop."

Her body leans forward as if on autopilot. "Why? Does it bother you?" If she moves one more inch, her lips will brush against his…but she doesn't want that. "You can't handle it and that's okay, Swanson. But don't accuse _me _of not having the guts, because we both know who's ahead in this game." Not that she necessarily thinks she's ahead, but he doesn't need to know that.

Jesse stares at her for a couple more minutes, his gaze heating hers and neither can look away. Beca swallows hard and hopes it's inconspicuous enough. "If you're sure about this, Mitchell, then there's no backing down," he finally says. "Once you cross this line, you can't go back."

…_What? What does_ that_ mean?_ She flushes when she sees his smirk, realizing she's just spoken her thoughts out loud.

"It means," he whispers, his breath brushing across her lips as she watches on with dilated pupils. "That if you're going to play this game with me, then you're going to accept the consequences of where it takes us. It means that things will change and we won't be able to back out easily. Are you prepared for that?" He's watching her steadily, searching her eyes for…well, she doesn't what he's searching for. Maybe a shred of doubt or even reluctance. And she's not sure what her answer should be; all she knows is that she wants to prove him wrong. She does have the guts to finish what she started. Doesn't she?

"I can handle it. Can you?" The answer springs forth and it's then she realizes that she's just agreed to something she hadn't thought through. At all. The soft look in his eyes, the one that had taken over while he was searching her face, fades away and with it gone comes a cool, blank mask. He nods, his nose brushing against hers and making her breath hitch because that's how close they are (she's almost gone cross-eyed).

"Enjoy your lunch," is all he says before he steps back and walks out of the booth like their conversation never happened.

Now she's just confused and okay, maybe a little panicked (no pat on the back for Beca; maybe a bitch slap for Beca).

* * *

Jesse was right. The dynamics of their relationship _(if it can even be called that)_ did alter. She doesn't think there's ever been this much touching. Two more weeks of this and Ian will either be pissed at the fact that the desk has been defiled or pleased that he's been proved right. UST.

And lots of it.

It started off simple enough. A brush of the hands, a heated gaze, a stroke across the shoulder in hello. Then it was a hand trailing down her arm, her fingers stroking the nape of his neck, a squeeze of her hips, her hand sneaking under his shirt to brush against his _(hard) _stomach in passing. And then it was unto something…more. His chest against her back as he stacks a CD, while she 'helps' him; her hand trailing down his spine as she presses into his side; his hot palm against her lower stomach, moving down toward her hipbones; her breath against his ear, her lunch order against his cheek; his breath brushing across her lips, him nosing her neck.

So, yes, it had gotten up close and personal. _But_- this was not done with _sighs _or _fluttering eyelashes _and_ cute smiles. _This was done with gritted teeth, reluctantly flushed faces, mischievous smirks, and glares.

What she's trying to accomplish? She has no clue. Maybe she just wants him to admit that he can't handle the pressure of being that close to her, because she has more of an effect on him than he has on her. And she hopes that this is the case, or else she'll have to cave first.

Because being that close to Jesse without actually having any right to be, hurts. He's not hers. And she's not his. And that won't change.

It's too late to change now.

...

_Two weeks later - Radio Station – Tuesday_

"You're late."

Jesse smirks as he heaves his backpack onto the desk. "Worried about me, Mitchell?"

"Worried about my lunch, actually. It's two o'clock and I'm starved, so chop chop," Beca replies as she looks through the crate of CD's. Her new mix is playing in the booth; an uninterrupted hour of good music for her listeners. She tries not to look up when she feels him inch closer to her.

"What do you want?" Jesse asks as his hand grazes her elbow.

Beca chews on her bottom lip as she spies on him from the corner of her eye. Jesse's sorting through another pile of albums, but she knows where his real attention's directed; if the hand tracing her hipbone is anything to go by. "Surprise me," she murmurs.

She can feel him move behind her, sliding her hair over one shoulder and bringing his mouth closer to her ear. "I'll do that."

Beca grits her teeth as she tries to ignore the heat building up in her lower stomach. She really hopes her face isn't red. Quickly thinking, Beca lifts her right hand to reach behind her and lightly rake her nails across the nape of his neck, the way she knows he likes (she found out about this a week ago when she'd done it to the skin of his stomach and he'd let out an involuntary groan; safe to say she'd won that round). She feels Jesse's breath hitch against her cheek and his hands tighten their grip on her hips. She waits for his turn.

And tries not to jump half-a-mile away when she feels his lips on her skin. They've never brought their mouths into the equation before; not with direct contact. Apparently, though, this asshole's decided to step up their game. Beca stays perfectly still, her hand sliding up to tangle in his hair as he continues to place soft kisses on her neck.

"What are you doing?" she asks shakily, once she finds her voice again.

She feels him pause. "I don't know," he whispers back, his mouth brushing against the skin above her pulse.

Beca closes her eyes and tries to breathe in deeply before turning around in his arms to face him. He's looking down at her but she keeps her gaze on the neckline of his shirt.

"Tell me to stop."

Beca frowns and tilts her head up to meet his stare. He's right. They should stop. What are they doing, anyway? This can't go anywhere.

She opens her mouth, fully intending to say the words, but all she can do is close it again when she sees the way he's looking at her. There's some sadness in his eyes, but there's also some hope. She doesn't know which feeling connects to each course of action; telling him to stop or letting him continue. And she's pretty sure he doesn't know, either. But there's something else under his scrutiny. And Beca's seen it before. Freshman year.

"You can't look at me like that," she replies, her voice breaking through the silence.

"How do I look at you?"

"I don't know! But you need to stop!"

"I'm not looking at you any differently from before."

"Yes, you are!" Are their faces getting closer?

Yup, their faces are closer.

Her eyes dart down to his lips. When she snaps them back to his face, she sees his own eyes trained on _her_ lips.

Jesse was right. This game of theirs has changed things between them. And even worse, the moment they both lean in, they lose any chance of going back.

* * *

_Wednesday_

"Pillow fight!"

Minutes later, Beca's whole room is covered in feathers.

"You guys are dorks."

Apparently, her singles room will now be used to host all future sleepovers. She's fine with this; it gets too lonely too quickly, anyway. Fat Amy never fails to remind her of this ("You miss me, Shawshank. You miss the Fat Amy loving. Don't worry, I am always here in spirit. You can tell with the way I've decorated your room"). And it's true. Beca finds a picture of Amy (either with two of her boyfriends or wrestling dingos) on every available surface throughout her room. It's a bit weird, but she doesn't have the heart to take them down. And the rest of the Bellas like the idea because they've also taken pictures with funny faces and taped them to her closet door. Aubrey and Chloe sent some, too (more like ten). Her friends are weirdos. But Beca loves them.

Which is why she wakes up in the middle of the night while everyone's asleep, spread around in their sleeping bags on the floor. She's betraying them. She's going behind their back. She's lying to them. And all for a guy. Well, okay, not just a guy.

Jesse.

But he's the last person she should be doing this with. He's her ex-friend. He's her ex-crush.

He's a fucking Treble Maker.

And she kissed him. And then she freaked, gathered her stuff and power-walked out of the station, ignoring the call of her name. Her first name. And now she doesn't know what to think. She doesn't know what she's doing. This can only end badly.

Beca feels sweat gather at the base of her neck. Her heart's pounding; small, frantic beats that are too strong and going too fast. Her stomach feels queasy.

And she barely makes it to the toilet in time. She's dry-heaving by the time she feels someone gather her hair into a bun and smooth a wet towel over her flushed cheeks.

"Beca?" Jessica questions softly. "Try to breathe, hun."

She can hear Kristen and Fat Amy's voice in the background. Her three friends pull her up gently from the floor and lead her over to the skin to splash some water on her face. She can make out the rest of the Bellas forms in the mirror, looking at her worriedly.

"I'm fine," she says when she can speak again, taking the bottle of water Amy offers her. "I just felt a bit nauseous. No big deal."

"But you're pale," Kristen frowns. "Was it something you ate, maybe?"

Beca nods slowly, "Yeah. That must be it. Sorry I woke you guys up."

Stacie waves her hand dismissively at her and grabs her arm to gently tug her back into the bedroom. "I have a bottle of Gatorade somewhere. You should drink that."

They spend the rest of the night watching bad soap operas and making sure Beca gets better. She gives a reassuring smile whenever one of them glances back at her apprehensively. Physically, she feels okay. Mentally, she's exhausted. And emotionally, she…doesn't know. She feels guilty. And the guilt weighs her down; it's like she has a brick in her chest.

Beca feels guilty because she knows what she's going to do tomorrow. And it goes against everything she's been taught as a Bella. Especially that damn oath.

* * *

_Radio Station – Thursday_

She doesn't expect Jesse to be there so damn early, so she's pretty surprised when she walks through the door and sees him calmly alphabetizing CDs.

She stares at him.

He stares back.

Not even threes seconds later, they meet each other halfway and then they're at it again. The worst part's the fact that it's not even strictly lustful tongue-hockey. It's a series of pecks. He's cupping her face and kissing her languidly, once, twice, three times. She holds onto his wrists as she tries not to melt from the sensation of being treated so gently; she's never had a series of kisses this beautiful before. _Damn it, nerd. _She can't think as he sucks on her bottom lip the fifth time around. Their noses brush together and his thumbs run over her cheeks as she strokes her fingers over his wrist bone.

They're both breathing heavily by the time they pull back. Jesse rests his forehead on hers and Beca keeps her eyes closed, hoping to avoid reality for as long as possible.

"What does this mean?" He asks her.

She opens her eyes to meet his. "That can't happen again," she replies. His face falls but he doesn't have time to feel the disappointment because Beca leans forward to capture his lips in a rough kiss, her tongue sliding along the seam of his lips to tangle with his. Jesse's gasp gets muffled against her mouth and then he kisses back just as fiercely. Beca pulls back after a few minutes, laying a peck on his chin. "But that can."

Jesse furrows his brow as he watches her with dilated pupils. "I don't understand. What does that mean?"

Beca clutches his shirt as she prepares to cross the final line in their game. "It means that we're just having fun. It means that you're my distraction. And it doesn't go farther than that."

He stares at her. And she stares back. "Okay."

* * *

_Yes, I made Beca feel as crappy as I do for a moment (I'm evil that way)._

_Now, back to huddling in a blanket and sipping tea in bed! Fun!_

_Review, my awesome peeps (if you haven't gotten sick of me and my late updates already)!_


	8. The Unsure

I apologize in advance for this chapter. The flashback feels like a filler and I'm not so sure about the present part, either. But you guys deserve an update; I keep you waiting long enough as it is. I promise the next one will be better!

* * *

_**Radio Station – Freshman Year**_

_She doesn't answer any of his calls._

_None. Zero. Zilch. Nada._

_For three whole weeks. _

_He tries, really tries to keep his cool. But he never stops replaying those never-ending thoughts over and over again. _

_Beca's angry at you. There is no such thing as 'progress' with her. There's definitely no possibility of forming a relationship with her; not even the slightest chance. Because making a mistake with Beca is like having to start all over again, right from the Go line. _

_And he tries not to call too much. He does. It's only daily. Sometimes it's even a text; those silly, dumb ones he used to send her all the time, rambling on about movie quotes and what they mean. She would always tease him for it. _

_Of course, he hasn't seen her in days. Not since she changed shifts; she has a new one in the late afternoon. He never stays long enough to meet her when she comes in. He knows Beca doesn't want to see him. And he wont' be that pushy._

_But he misses her. And he likes to think that she misses him. It doesn't matter if Bumper snaps at him to 'get his head out of his ass' at every possible minute when his cousin sees him moping about. _

_He's determined. This is what drives him to forcibly enter the booth one afternoon and ignore Luke's protests as he grabs one of Beca's hard drives and roughly plugs it into the computer to finally get the Brit to listen. He only leaves once Luke promises to play her music on the air tomorrow, after staring in surprise at the mix coming in through the speakers and bobbing his head to the beat._

_If that doesn't get to Beca to come in during his shift, well, he doesn't know what will. _

* * *

He can't look any of the Trebles in the eye anymore.

Because it's one thing to try and hit on a new Bella just for kicks, but it's another to actually get involved with one in a… a what?

Relationship? No.

Truth is, he doesn't know what they are right now. And Beca wasn't exactly helping. In fact, her set of rules made matters worse.

Yes, that's right. Rules.

"_Because we need them. To establish boundaries."_

"_It sounds ridiculous," Jesse drones. "A waste of time. But fine, Mitchell. What kind of hellish rules do you want to set?"_

_Beca bites her bottom lip as she thinks and he tries not to zero in on the pink rim. "One: No first names-"_

"_No. We're going to be involved with each other in…I don't know, make-outs and stuff," he says unsurely as she raises an eyebrow at him. "It'd be weird to not be on a first name basis with the person you…make out with…and stuff. Maybe."_

"_Fine…" she hesitates. "Jesse."_

"_Okay, then…Beca." That's going to take some getting used to._

_Beca lets out a breath. "Okay, so anyway, two: we can't tell _anyone_-"_

"_That's obvious enough," Jesse mutters._

"_Will you stop interrupting me?" Beca snaps. "I know you know that. But it's easier said than done. The Trebles are involved in your life just as much as the Bellas are involved in mine, and if they find out about this…well, it'd be hell. So we have to be careful and you can't mess up."_

"_Right, because I'm the only potential candidate for that here," Jesse states dryly. _

"_You're a pain in my ass, Swanson." Figures the first names wouldn't last long._

"_Ditto. Are we done here?"_

_Beca glares at him. "No. Three: Once this ends, nothing changes. We'll get bored with each other eventually. And then it's back to ignoring one another. Simple and clean."_

_Jesse mulls this over. "You're talking about a 'no strings attached' thing here."_

"_Yes."_

"_Good. Wouldn't want your feelings to get in the way. And try to remember not to fall in love with me, too." _

"_Don't know how I'll manage that, but I'll give it my all," Beca deadpans. _

_Jesse gestures at her impatiently to go on._

"_Four: we can't date other people while we're- uh. Together." She flinches at her own words. "No- not- you know what I mean. While we're fooling around or whatever."_

_He nods in agreement, choosing not to tease her on the stuttering. "Agreed. That would be wrong. What else?"_

"_Five: ...we need to establish what exactly we're…going to do," she replies uncomfortably._

_Jesse's eye twitches. "Hmm," he hums noncommittally. He's not really looking at her anymore, instead choosing to level his stare at the railing on the second floor. _

"_I'm not a slut," Beca says offhandedly. _

_Jesse's head snaps back to her. "I never said you were," he shakes his head slowly._

_Beca shrugs and looks away. "I know. I just…I mean, we've-" she motions to him with a wince. "We've kissed and that's it. But, I don't want you to think I do that with just anyone-"_

"_I would never think that about you," he says seriously, trying to catch her eye. He really wouldn't. Beca has never been that kind of girl and he's always respected her for it. This is something new for both of them and it's kind of a relief that he's not the only one nervous about a casual fling-thing (whatever this is) with the last person he ever expected._

_Beca's shoulders slump in relief. "Okay," she nods. "So…"_

"_We'll just see where it goes. It won't help creating so many limitations now, when neither of us is sure of what's going on in the first place. Let's just…see where it leads, okay?" _

_Se eyes him distrustfully, but the sincere look on his face softens hers. "Deal," she holds her hand out. _

"_Deal," he murmurs as his hand reaches out to grab hers and pull her just that tiny bit closer. "So…"_

"_Yup," she breathes out as she stands up on her tiptoes to bring her mouth closer to his._

_He smiles as he meets her lips, thinking about how tiny she is and how her body seems to fit right up against his-_

If he could chop off his head right now, he would. Anything to get rid of the thoughts that don't seem to stay in agreement with the established set of rules. There is obviously something wrong with him. This is _Beca._ No, wait, he meant…this is _Mitchell. _And nothing good can come from this. They're probably going to end up loathing each other more than they already do.

But then again, he's just doing what any testosterone fueled male would do. It's the hormones. He's not at fault here. And this could be like…taking one for the team. In doing this, he may gather crucial information that could help take down the Bellas' reign. Beca's curls…and eyes…and body…and lips have nothing on him. He doesn't think about these things. They don't keep him up at night.

Just… No.

And if for some reason they _did, _it's because…he's studying them. In a purely platonic matter. For research. That way, and only that way, will he be able to exploit her weaknesses.

For blackmailing purposes.

Because he's evil.

Yes, that's it. Jesse Swanson knows what he's doing. And he will prevail. He will-

"Why is your eye twitching?"

He squints up at Kolio from the floor rug, where he landed after flying off the couch in alarm. "How's it going, man?" Jesse asks nonchalantly. That's right. He's cool. _Always. Cool._

"'Sup." Kolio nods down at him. "You gonna get up anytime soon?"

"I prefer it here. It's my thinking nest." _Then why is your mind so messed up, Swanson?_ Great. Now he's hearing her voice in his head.

"Sure," Kolio eyes him weirdly (must be due to the freaked out expression on his face). "Well, just wanted to check up on our Treble captain, considering you've been AWOL these past few days. You on your period or something?"

"Haha," Jesse deadpans. He lifts himself up from the floor and smirks back at his friend. "I'm great, thanks for asking."

"Then let's head out back. Rehearsal starts soon." Kolio says as he reaches out to push Jesse by the shoulders toward the patio.

"I'm going, I'm going, just let me get a drink first," Jesse waves him on and heads to the kitchen. He watches through the glass doors as Kolio sneaks up behind Unicycle, who's cringing away from Benji's pet dove ("Houdini the III" is the name, he thinks), and yells loudly in the brunette's ears, causing the latter to give a 'manly' shriek. This then turns into a mock wrestling fight, Sheba and Brian watching on amusedly, and Jesse grins into his cup.

He still feels a bit guilty, yes. But that doesn't mean he should miss out on the time he has left at Barden. It's his junior year; he's bound to make mistakes, right? Whatever it is he's doing with Beca, he's willing to stick around and see where it goes, how it ends. Maybe he should've learned from last time, but this…this could be different. Things could go smoothly this time around.

Maybe.

* * *

_Radio Station - Thursday_

He can tell she's surprised when he takes the CD from her hand and stacks it for her on the high shelf (her height has never really given her the advantage of being able to reach tall places). In fact, she's probably just as surprised as he was when she came out of the booth to help him ten minutes ago. He doesn't know if they're friends, or even just buddies. But he figures that if they're going to start doing…stuff…then they have to at least try to be friendly with each other. So he decides to start up a conversation.

"So…"

Beca quirks an eyebrow at him, wearing a small, amused smile as she picks up another box of CDs.

"What's up?" Well, that sounded stupid. And by the look on her face, she agrees. "How are…things? All good?"

"You don't have to do that," Beca says as she gives him a side-glance.

Jesse's brow arches. "Do what?"

She rolls her eyes. "Try to make small talk. This whole…" she waves her hand around, as if motioning to the place where _it _started is enough of an explanation. "It doesn't make us friends."

It's a pretty harsh reminder of the fact that he has no clue _what the hell he's doing._

Jesse watches her with narrowed eyes. "Then what does it make us? Fuck buddies?" He raises an eyebrow at Beca's wince. "Yeah, I don't like that term either. And we've never even…so that can't be it. Friends with benefits? Nope. 'Cause like you just said, we're not friends. That's funny, I guess there's no name for what we're doing," he says dryly. "Listen, you might not like labels, but I need something more concrete because I don't know where we stand right now. So I'm sorry for trying to 'make small talk' that could possibly get us to know each other better. How silly of me to want to get more acquainted with the person whose lips I've practically been attached to for the past week-"

The sharp sound of a CD smacking against the table surface cuts him off from his sarcastic streak. "Look," Beca says in a tight voice and he can almost hear her teeth grinding together. "I don't know what to call us either, okay? _I don't_. So I just think it's best not to bother labeling something we both know is going to end soon, anyway. It's stupid and it shouldn't even be happening-"

"So why are we doing it?" Jesse asks, also directing the question at himself.

Beca freezes and stares back at him. "I don't know," she licks her lips nervously.

_But I do, _he thinks as he watches her bite her bottom lip. "Uh…" Jesse swallows. "Me neither. I…I have no clue." His hand itches by his side, eager to touch her.

She scowls as she rubs her forehead with one hand, wrapping her other arm around her stomach, just beneath her breasts, causing them to push up a bit. This is, of course, barely noticeable to her, an unimportant result of a subconscious action. But he's a man. And he notices.

He definitely notices.

Jesse straightens up as he meets her gaze with practiced ease. "Beca…" Might as well throw in a first name; it might soften her up. "I like kissing you." He sees her swallow and watches her watch him closely. "Wait. Let me rephrase that. I love kissing you," he states gruffly as his eyes glue themselves to her lips once more. He's trying to tone it down; it's not like he wants to scare her off. But she doesn't exactly make it easy for him when she…well, when she moves. Even talking diverts his attention elsewhere. "I'm attracted to you, Beca." Hey, why stop halfway? He must as well go all out with the honesty. "So, if you still want to... I'd like to continue this."

Please.

_Please. _

All she can do is blink at him owlishly.

Jesse nods, "I'll take that as a 'yes'."

So ten minutes later, when he has the girl gasping beneath him, laid down on the desk, from just the skill of his mouth alone (he has no reason to feign modesty), he thinks he quite enjoys the image of Mitchell's lips red and swollen (he likes her this way; when no biting words are coming out of that beautiful mouth).

They don't have a label. And he never knows what the next step is supposed to be. But he doesn't think about these things as he nips along her jawline. His mind shuts off for a while and it's like they follow an unspoken agreement. He doesn't really get why she's so certain that whatever it is they have will die down in a bit, because it's hard to imagine he'll want to stop any time soon. It may be a bit worrying that the thought doesn't scare him like it should.

But remember. This is only for blackmailing purposes. And exploiting weaknesses. Which is why he needs to shift his concentration onto the way he feels her sigh against his cheek.

Let him do his job now.


	9. The Inner Workings of the Mind

I know you must hate me...

Please don't? Heh heh.

I left a note on my profile explaining my absence (don't read it, it's dorky) and basically, I'm pointing all accusing fingers at College and work. They get in the way. Unjustness, I tell you!

In advance, thank you guys for having read up to this point and if you'd like, (and if you aren't sick of my late updates) you can continue, 'cause I promise I will finish this story, I just don't know how often I'll be able to update.

Your reviews keep me sane. Now, I'm gonna go study, Have a fun night ahead of me...

* * *

_**Auditorium – Freshman Year**_

"_Not bad," the blonde mutters. _

_Beca's sure the time spent in looking over her shoulder incredulously at her isn't worth losing the Olympic pace she has set, but that doesn't mean she doesn't have her 'are you fucking kidding me' face on right now. _

"_Pick it up!" Aubrey shouts from below, checking the time on her stopwatch and watching Beca sprint up the steps. "And… Stop." She watches on almost amusedly as Beca slows down drastically, only to collapse onto an auditorium chair and try to catch her breath. "Well then. That was a whole lot better than yesterday. Now I hope you'll know better than to try and laze about during Bella rehearsal."_

_The darkly lined eyes watch the haughty blonde narrowly. "Yup. Learned my lesson. Thanks," Beca deadpans. _

_Aubrey sniffs, "This was for your own good, Beca. You need discipline. And I will not have you moping about while the rest of us work hard on-"_

"_Sucky choreography and outdated-"_

"_Perfectly executed choreography and well known classics," Aubrey cuts her off with a glare. "I don't even know why I try to get through to you. Why are you even here, then?"_

_That was a good question. "As if I had a choice," Beca mutters. Fat Amy had practically hauled her over like a sack of potatoes, insisting that Aubrey would keep her threat of throwing Beca out of the Bellas if she didn't meet her there for a 'boot camp' rehearsal as punishment for the last flunk out. She eyes the tall blonde standing there with two fingers rubbing her temples and her heels tapping against the wooden floor. Honestly, the girl was like something out of 'Desperate Housewives'; uptight and a bit too worried about being 'socially acceptable'. Not that Beca watches Desperate Housewives, but… _

"_Beca," Aubrey snaps, cutting her off from her thoughts. "I will not have you ruining our chances at Semi-Finals. I let it go the first week, believing Chloe when she told me about prison being a traumatizing experience for you," Beca raises her eyebrows at this and tries not to smirk. "But that's not an excuse anymore. You've had time to get it together. So why aren't you getting it together?" The Bella captain grits her teeth. _

"_I'll try harder next time," Beca says nonchalantly. She meets Aubrey's hard gaze coolly and waits for the blonde's 'heavily resigned' shake of the head as a sign for her to go home. She stands up to grab her bag and leave but Aubrey stops her with a raised hand before she reaches the bottom step. Beca crosses her arms and waits impatiently. _

_The blonde furrows her brow as she makes to speak, before closing her mouth again. She purses her lips and stares steadily at Beca. "Is… Are you… distracted because of… a boy?" She asks with a disgusted sneer. _

_Beca scoffs and luckily stops the flush that almost rushes to her face. "No. I'm just sick of your boring routine. I've told you already, we should mix things up a bit-"_

"_No," Aubrey takes a deep breath as she stops her with a raised hand. "No. You're distracted. Because of that… boy. That Jesse kid. Bumper's kid."_

_Beca raises a dubious eyebrow. "Bumper's kid? You make it sound like he raised him or some crap like that."_

"_Because he practically did," Aubrey spits and Beca's taken aback by the anger that seems to come out of nowhere. "He's related to him; that's already bad news. Bumper always has some kind of influence; some kind of power. That makes the kid an ass just by association-"_

"_Jesse's not an ass," Beca snaps. She clears her throat and tries to cool down. "His cousin is. Jesse's just… nothing. I mean, he's not nothing. He's just not… anything to me. And he doesn't distract me."_

_Aubrey raises a perfectly plucked eyebrow in response. _

"_Forget it," Beca mumbles. "You wouldn't get it anyway." She makes to shove her way past the senior._

"_He's not good news, Beca," Aubrey calls after her, making her roll her eyes. "I know these things. So stop being stubborn and listen-"_

"_What do you know about listening?" Beca whirls around to face her. "Try this: you really need to get over this whole acapella rivalry thing. It's getting old. And it's stupid," she says._

_Aubrey stares back at her. "I know these things," she repeats quietly. "And I try to do what's best for the team, Beca," her voice gradually growing louder. "I will not have you ruining things by fraternizing with the enemy."_

"_Don't worry," Beca chuckles sarcastically. "I haven't seen Jesse in weeks. So your little 'no treble boning' oath is safe… for now," she adds just to get on the blonde's nerves, smirking as she walks out the door and hears the frustrated huff behind her._

_Screw Barbie and her oath. And most of all, screw the sucky set they have prepared for Semi-Finals; the one with the same sucky songs and same sucky choreography. _

_She makes her way toward the coffee shop around the corner, mentally counting the minutes until she gets to her dorm and takes a shower. Today, however, is not her day, as evidenced by the few seconds it takes for her to get her ice cold coffee and turn, only to bump into a Treble._

_The four eyed, hipster Treble._

"_Hey, you're Beca the Bella," Four eyes tells her. _

"_Please don't say that again," she frowns at him good-naturedly. "What's up?"_

_He smiles at her. "A whole lot actually. Semifinals coming up, team's stressed, friend's moping about 'cause someone's ignoring him… the usual." Well, someone cuts to the chase. "I'm Donald, by the way. Figured you didn't know my name," he puts a hand in his pocket and shrugs. _

"_And you already know mine, so…" she shrugs back, smiling when he fist bumps her. _

"_It's good to meet you. Wanted to know what kind of girl got Swanson acting all sullen," he chuckles._

_Beca huffs out a laugh. "Jesse and I… we're fine," she says unconvincingly. Jesse and _I_? Donald crosses his arms and arches a brow at her. People have got to stop catching on to her lies… _

"_Okay," he drawls and lets the subject go, to Beca's relief. "Well then, how about we chat? I mean, I know it goes against protocol and all, but you can never have too many friends, right?" He jokes. _

_She likes this dude. He's cool- "What do you mean by protocol?" she asks abruptly, unusually bothered by the use of the word._

_Donald looks at her surprised. "Oh. Nothing, I mean, the 'no fooling around with a Treble' thing…"_

"_You guys know about the oath?" She tilts her head confoundedly. "How?"_

_Donald laughs. "There's not much we don't know about our competition. Bumper makes sure of that."_

"_Does Jesse know?"_

_He balks. "Well, yeah," he says slowly. "Is that a bad thing?"_

_Yes. Because he had kissed her. Yes. Because he'd gotten close to her. Yes. Because he'd known it was going to get her in trouble with the 'Bitch Bella Regimen'. Yes. _

_It's a bad thing._

"_Well, that's…" she trails off. "Great."_

_Just great. _

* * *

Her pen taps against the blank piece of paper. It should probably be her head banging against the desk, trying to knock some sense into her, but she already tried that…

Come on, _think._

This should be easy, really. And it's not like Beca needs the reminder. It's just for reinforcement.

_Reasons to hate Jesse Swanson_

_1. Freshman year. (_'Nuff said.)

_2. He's arrogant. And cocky. And too smug for his own good. _(Basically, he's an egotistic son of a-)

_3. His face. It's weird. _(It really is. It's got all these… weird angles.)

_4. His hair. It's weirder. _(And he shouldn't be allowed to have better hair than her. Maybe she should ask him about his shampoo…)

_5. His abs, they're definitely airbrushed on. So fake. _(Ignore the fact that she felt the actual muscles in the weeks of teasing before the kissing catalyst... just ignore it.)

_6. He's a nerd. And not even an awesome one… a total dork. A Weirdo. Loser. _(You get the point…)

_7. He watches way too many movies. _(She wonders if he still has that…annoying habit of mouthing the words.)

_8. He makes up words like 'moviecation'. Who does that? _(He probably thinks it's clever of him. Ha. Pffttt. No.)

_9. The way he stacks CDs. It looks stupid. His arms flex and his biceps go all- _(No. Erase- erase that.)

_10. His doe eyed look and the dumb grin on his face. I mean, the eyes are just too… brown. _(Ugh. The color of mud. Not of warmth… or something.) _And that grin. It's the cheesiest thing known to mankind. It even comes with freaking dimples as a side package. _(She hates his dimples. They're like dents in his face… such a great smile… No, they look bad on him… awful, they look awful.)

_11. His kissing expertise. Yeah, it doesn't exist. _(Such a horrible kisser. She's had better… There was that Josh dude, and then… she's just had better, okay? And that embarrassing moan she let out last time? That was a moan of pain. _Pain. _At being kissed so terribly. But she doesn't want to hurt his feelings, so she'll tough it out… Such a good person, she is.)

_12. His arms. _(Did she already mention his arms?) _Just so… Blah. Nothing on Luke, that's for sure. Who cares if they can lift her up with no problem at all? So what, nerd works out. Hoorah for him. But, I mean, whatever. _(They feel nice, though, and apparently she likes to grab them a lot since at least one of her hands always ends up wrapped around the bicep-)

_Fuck. _This is not going well. She really wants her inner devil to shut up. How _in the hell _is she supposed to create a hatred-filled list if these thoughts keep creeping into her head. She only has _twelve _reasons. And they're not even good ones!

(Or very truthful, but let's ignore that for now.)

It just doesn't make sense. She should be able to make a list of fifty, no, a _hundred_, things she hates about Jesse Swanson. _But she's stuck. _

This is all his fucking fault. Damn that asshole. Damn him. Damn, damn, damn-

"Are you having a mental breakdown?"

Beca sighs against the desk her head has just plopped down onto with an audible bang. "Not now, Amy." _Yup, that's gonna bruise._

Fat Amy eyes Beca suspiciously from the latter's bed, the one she's currently lounging on as she spills all kinds of crumbs from her bag of chips. "What's got you in such an awful mood, Toothpick? Haven't you been getting some?"

Beca's eyes snap to Amy's form and flit away quickly. "What are you talking about?" She asks rapidly. "I'm not with anyone."

Fat Amy arches a brow at her. "Oh really? I thought you were… You've been un Becaish these past couple of weeks, like almost Jessica-level-happy."

The desk chair almost gets knocked over when Beca stands too quickly and grips the edge of the table to keep from falling over. "That's not true!" She shouts defensively.

She tries to keep herself from flushing when Amy just stares at her with her mouth agape. "That's not true," Beca clears her throat in an effort to remain calm. "I haven't been happier… just, excited for Regionals since they're coming up and all." She winces as she feels a sharp pain in the corner of her forehead. _Wow. I actually did bruise myself. Good going, Beca!_

She hates her inner thoughts sometimes.

"Right," Amy drawls. "Right. Okay. Huh. Must have just been me then."

"Yes, it must have," Beca narrows her eyes at her.

Amy gives a dubious hum and watches her closely, until she's squirming from her intuitive friend's unwanted attention. "You know, Shawshank," Amy begins. "There's no fun in having dirty little secrets. Talk to Fat Amy. Tell her all about it. She will help you reach a peaceful state of mind," Amy nods solemnly.

Beca shoots her a grimace. "It freaks me out when you start talking in third person."

Fat Amy sighs. "Trying to get you to talk about your feelings is like yanking teeth out. Fat Amy is not pleased with this procedure." She stands up and walks over to where Beca's leaning against the desk, reaching out to pat the top of the shorter girl's head comfortingly. "It's going to be alright, child."

"What the hell, Amy?" Beca gives an exasperated huff. "I'm fine," she says as she pushes away Amy's hand. A second later, she finds herself way too close to Amy's cleavage for comfort as the tall girl hugs her forcefully.

"I understand. Do what you have to do. Just make sure you don't get hurt," Fat Amy frowns as she strokes Beca's hair with a not so gentle hand.

Beca's response is muffled against Amy's shirt and she tries to squirm away lest she pass out from not being able to breathe. "Okay," she gasps for air. "Whatever you say. Just let me go, I'm suffocating."

Amy happily lets her plop back down onto the desk chair and goes to pick up her discarded bag of chips. "I told you Fat Amy would make it all better," she says while chewing. "You just needed one of my famous hugs. I should've done that ages ago; how have you survived this long without them?"

"I've no clue," is Beca's dry response.

"Okay, well, I have to go. I have a hot date with a sexy ass on the swim team. You should see his butt, Beca, it's so plum. Yum," the Australian grins as she picks up her stylish, leopard print purse.

_Jesse's butt isn't too bad, eithe-_

Oh for fuck's sake.

"That's great, Amy," Beca tries to smile cheekily at her. "Have fun."

"Hasta la vista, baby," Amy waves as she walks out the door.

Beca heaves a big sigh as she turns back to the piece of paper currently dampening her mood. She scowls at the twelve measly reasons written and crumbles it up into a ball. Not even a month into their… situation… and she already feels like she's losing control, too fast, too soon. This is ridiculous.

_You're reading too much into this._

She has to read into it. She has to plan ahead and keep her emotions in check. Where will she end up if she doesn't? She has good reason to be on guard; Jesse's enough of a reason to make sure she keeps herself alert to anything that might… hurt her.

_Jesse wouldn't hurt you._

Bullshit.

_Fine. Jesse would never hurt you intentionally._

How is she supposed to believe that? She barely knows him.

_Not true._

It's been over a year since she's talked to him on civil terms. So yes, she doesn't know him. Not really.

_He probably hasn't changed much. He's still the same nerd._

She's not the same. How can she expect him to be? Besides, she's not supposed to get to know him again. This is strict business. Or pleasure. Whatever it is. Nothing personal. They just like making out, okay?

_Right. What about that first time he kissed you? I mean, really kissed you. It was slow… and soft. You're the one that started rushing things. You're the one that wanted to make it seem like only lust. But it's not just lust-_

Shut up. It is. Just lust.

_Don't get angry with me. I'm you. I'm just telling you what you don't want to admit to yourself._

And what's that?

It's at this point that Beca's inner conscious stops arguing with her. Either because it doesn't have an answer, or she really is afraid of admitting it to herself.

Not that she knows what _it _is.

Beca jumps about three feet up when her phone buzzes, effectively cutting her off from her thoughts. She rubs her hand over her forehead, which is still throbbing, as she opens up the new text from some familiar digits.

Speak of the devil.

_You free?_

She takes a breath as she reads the message, quickly typing back a response and throwing the phone on her bed. It'd be easier to program his number in, but the Bellas look through her cell enough and that would produce too many unwanted, and not to mention inexplicable (unless she wants all hell to let loose), questions. She gnaws on her bottom lip for what feels like hours as she waits for the knock on her door, inhaling sharply when it finally comes.

"Hey," he gives her a small smile when she lets him in. Beca checks to make sure there's no one outside her room paying attention and turns back to Jesse, now sitting on her bed, after shutting the door.

"Hi," she says with a tight-lipped smile. She eyes the laptop he brought with him and her eyes betray her surprise when they slide over to the couple of DVDs being held in his right hand.

Jesse shrugs. "I just got done with rehearsal. I always watch a movie afterward and we agreed to meet today, so I just thought… maybe we could watch one together," he swallows, staring straight at her. "But we don't have- hey. What happened to you?" Jesse furrows his brow in concern.

Beca lifts her gaze from the movies to look at him with a confused expression on her face. Jesse points to his own forehead and she colors as her hand immediately reaches up to rest over the purplish tinge she's sure covers the left upper corner of her forehead. "Oh. Nothing. Don't worry about it," she tries to play off nonchalantly.

Jesse stands up and walks right over to her, reaching out to grab her wrist and gently pull it away from the bruise. "I think a bump is forming. What happened?" His fingers leisurely graze the small injury and his warm, brown eyes search hers intently.

_Thinking about our situation gives me headaches. You're the reason I have mental breakdowns and apparently, masochistic tendencies because I really did not mean to hit my head that hard in an effort to get you out of my mind._

_That's what happened. _

_And you need to stop touching me. I can't think clearly. _

_And don't look at me like that._

"Accident at rehearsal is all," Beca manages to say without her voice reaching an embarrassing pitch. "I'll just put some ice on it or something. No worries, Swanson." She gives him another forced smile.

Jesse blinks and his hand snaps back to his side as he fidgets uncomfortably. She ignores the disappointment weighing in her chest. "Right," he nods.

They stand there for an uncomfortable set of minutes, him with his hands in his pockets, looking anywhere but at her, and she with her arms crossed, glaring at the floor.

"So do you want to?" Jesse asks her after a moment of silence, making Beca jump.

"What?" she arches a brow at him.

He rubs the back of his neck and she tries not to smile at the image. "Watch a movie?" he asks slowly.

Beca blinks and pushes her hair out of her face as she looks back to the laptop and DVDs on the bed.

No. Too close to home.

_But you want to._

She can't.

_It's just a movie. Don't be so dramatic._

It's not the fucking movie. It's the meaning of watching one with him… It's the fact that they'd be hanging out and not just making out…

_Why are you worrying about that? I thought you said it was just lust. Surely, this won't mean anything._

He'll start raving on about fun facts and what not. It's moviecation all over again.

_You can handle it, can't you? What are you so afraid of? _

…You're a bitch.

_Thanks. _

"Beca?"

She shuts her eyes tightly and rubs the bridge of her nose. "You won't start raving on about the film's production, will you?"

Jesse's lips quirk up. "No. Just the score… Unless the production's beyond amazing, then you know I just have to." He moves over to the bed and makes himself comfortable, like he's always been so good at doing, and pats the spot next to him while smirking after propping up some pillows.

She rolls her eyes and walks over to sit beside him, leaning back comfortably so they're shoulder to shoulder and bringing up her legs to rest beside her.

"So," Jesse starts happily as he presses play. "Cast Away. Tom Hanks. Not watching this movie is like missing out on a great life lesson, Bec…"

She stares at him. He keeps on blabbing, like he hasn't just realized he's just said her old nickname (well, her nickname _according to him_) and she can't help but wonder why the hell he's so damn comfortable. This is weird. It's supposed to be weird. How can he act so normal?

_Admit it._

Beca's head snaps back to the screen, absently nodding while Jesse enthusiastically starts explaining the film's production (he does it on purpose, just to annoy her, she's sure) and trying to breathe calmly at the same time. Admit what?

It's at this point, that her inner conscious decides to be a pain in the ass.

_Admit the fact that Jesse has never stopped meaning as much to you as he did before. _

Beca really should have listened to Amy about trying to reach a peaceful state of mind.


	10. Treble-Boned

How can I even describe in words how amazing you all are? Just knowing that there are still people who read my story (with its crazy late updates), thank you guys. Good news, I'm done with Finals! So, I have a small break between semesters. I'm still working, which is why this took me so long, but I promise you, every free moment of mine is spent on this. Anyway, got to get going, have reviews to leave and PM's to answer.

Special mention:

_ingeniousmacabre: _Kyle, you are the cure to my writer's block. And you can all thank her for giving me the idea to give Luke a bigger role (which will come up).

_theasbofive: _I love you for reminding me to write and because your story makes me fall more in love with Jesse than I already am.

_FatPatricia515: _For giving me the idea to use the song "Shiver" by Maroon Five.

_And to everyone who's ever reviewed, you guys are my beloved nerds. (This is my hell week, and I'm a bit sentimental. Sorry.)_

* * *

_**Day of Semi-Finals – Freshman year**_

"_This is my track! You're playing my song right now! That is awesome! You like it? You put it on the radio! That is amazing!"_

_Not exactly who you were supposed to go running to, Bec._

"_Sick beat," Luke smiles back at her._

"_Yeah, I always thought her beats were pretty sick," Jesse tries putting his two cents in. According to the frost on Beca's side glance, he shouldn't have said anything at all._

_Stupid Luke. _

_Jesse makes his way down the stairs, his steps faltering a bit when he hears Luke ask Beca out to a club. He tries not to sigh in relief when he remembers they have the semi-finals tonight. Beca wouldn't ditch…right?_

_Did Luke just say flood detergent training?_

"…_I have the semi-finals tonight." _

_She's hesitating. And actually considering it. _She's considering it.

"_Really?" Luke raises a set of dubious eyebrows. "I did not have you pegged as an a-capella girl."_

"_That's 'cause you don't know _Becky_ like I do," he says coldly as he shoves his way past Luke. "See you tonight."_

_If you're even thinking about still going._

_He sees Beca look at him with a frown from the corner of his eye but heads out the station before she can get a word in. Benji's waiting for him by the sidewalk and they've barely walked twenty steps when he hears her call his name._

"_Hey!" She catches up to him. "What was that?"_

_He glances back at her with a raised eyebrow but keeps walking. "What was… what?"_

"_Hi Beca," Benji waves awkwardly from the side._

"_Hi Benji," she smiles at him. The small upturn of her lips falls as soon as she turns to face Jesse again, putting a hand on his shoulder to stop him mid-stride._

"_You know what. What are you angry at me for?"_

"_I should be asking you the same question," he furrows his brow._

_Beca huffs. "Forget it. Can we just forget the whole..." she waves her hand around. "Let's just forget the whole thing."_

"_Are you going tonight?" He asks abruptly, making her arch her brows in confusion. "To semi-finals. Are you going?"_

"_Why wouldn't I be?" Beca asks incredulously. _

_He resists the urge to roll his eyes. "Because I heard Luke invite you to a club, so…"_

"_So… what?" she snaps._

_He shakes his head. "Nothing. I just thought… since maybe he played your music and everything, you would, I don't know, go with him." _

"_Are you implying that I should?" She scowls and places a loose strand of hair behind her ear._

"_No," he snaps. "Well, no, I… I don't care."_

"_You don't care?" She asks slowly._

_Jesse shrugs offhandedly and shakes his head. No, he doesn't. Well, maybe. But he's not going to tell her that. "You switched shifts." He changes the subject._

_She shifts uncomfortably. "Yeah…"_

"_It's been weeks," he states almost accusingly._

"_And?" She barks at him. _

_He raises his hands in surrender. "I thought you wanted to forget the whole thing."_

"_You're kind of making it difficult to."_

"_I get if you're still mad-"_

"_I'm not."_

"_Uh, guys?" Benji rubs the back of his head, being unfortunately ignored for the time being._

"_Why are you snapping at me then?"_

"_You're the one being snappy. Not me."_

"_Sure."_

"_Guys…"_

"_I don't even know why I came out here… I'm gonna go."_

"_Fine, go hang with Luke," Jesse grumbles._

"_This isn't about Luke!"_

"_Why are you yelling at me?" Again._

"_I'm not!"_

_Jesse makes a show of rubbing his ear. "Not so sure about that, Beca."_

_She takes a deep breath and lifts a hand. "You know what? It doesn't matter. This isn't about Luke, or my dad, or semi's. Okay?"_

"_Okay," he drawls. _

_There's a beat of tense silence with Benji looking on worriedly and Beca gnawing on her lip while Jesse stares at the ground._

"_What's it about then?"_

"_God, Jesse!"_

"_I really want to know."_

_She purses her lips and glares at him. "You knew."_

_He furrows his brow. "About…?"_

"_The oath."_

_His shoulders stiffen. "The Bella Oath?"_

"_What other one is there?" she crosses her arms. _

"_Woah, wait, Bec-"_

"_Did you want to get me in trouble? Because you knew it would," she raises her eyebrows. There's a trace of actual hurt in her eyes and he starts to hate himself a little._

"_No Bec," his head shakes back and forth firmly. "That was never my intention. Trust me, I wouldn't do that. Why would you think I would?"_

"_I didn't. I just…wasn't sure." She stares at a point past his shoulder for a second and then gives him a faint nod. "Okay."_

_He stares at her for any uncertainty. "Okay," he finally sighs in relief._

"_Uh, Jesse? Pizza?" Benji asks unsurely, giving Beca a small grin. "You want to come, Beca?"_

"_Oh, no. Thanks though. It's just that I have work, so you know." She shrugs and starts taking a few steps backwards_

"_I thought you and Jesse had the same shifts?" Benji calls out confusedly._

"_We used to," Jesse mutters._

_Beca points back to the station awkwardly. "I'm just gonna go now."_

_Jesse's voice stops her before she turns fully around. "Hey Bec." She turns to face him questioningly. "I'm glad you got to listen to your music on the radio."_

_She shrugs and plays with the hem of her blazer. "Yeah, glad Luke decided to give it a shot."_

_He opens his mouth to say something but then thinks better of it. He just settles for a nod and a small "Yeah," instead._

…

_**Bus Ride**_

"_You guys are gonna get pitch-slapped _so _hard, your man boobs are gonna concave."_

_Way to go, Amy. Bumper's always been a bit insecure about his… man boobs. It's a pretty scary sight to witness when he takes his shirt off in a rampage for the a-ca groupies._

_Not that he's ever had to see that…_

_He's suffered a lot. He'd rather block it out._

"_This is awkward," Scott whispers from the seat on his left._

"_Maybe for you. I've got a pretty nice view in front of me," Brandon chuckles quietly as Stacie adjusts her cleavage across from him. _

_Jesse tries to catch Beca's eye, but she studiously avoids his gaze. He frowns and only looks away from the side of her face when he feels someone's glare on him. He resists the urge to roll his eyes when he catches Bumper shooting him a sneer and making telltale signs with his hands, meant to stop him from locking his eyes onto Beca._

"_What the hell are you doing?" Aubrey's face reveals the deeply rooted scorn she feels for his cousin. _

"_Nothing, Barbie. Mind your own damn business," Bumper tells her condescendingly. "And show a little appreciation for our taking the time to come get you hags and not leaving you stranded. We would've done the audience a great favor."_

_The tension from the Bellas comes out in waves and Jesse can sense a not so bright future ahead for their team leader._

"_Listen hear, you narcissistic pig-"_

"_Aubrey," Chloe states warningly._

"_Yeah, careful, Posen."_

"_Shut it, Allen," Aubrey grits her teeth._

_Bumper leans back onto his seat and looks to Jesse. "Finally see what I've been telling you about all these years? This is where a-ca bitchiness originates. The flight attendant group with the sole talent of showing off their legs and making people slip into a coma," he casually mentions._

"_That's it!" Aubrey screams like a banshee before flying off her chair with the purpose of yanking Bumper's hair out. _

_Jesse can only watch wide-eyed as Fat Amy and Chloe try to separate the two leaders from causing long lasting damage and Donald starts shouting at them from the front seat. Brandon takes advantage of everyone's attention on the fight as he starts taking close-up pictures of Stacie with his cell phone. Unicycle also uses the moment to his advantage, sneaking out the last remaining burritos from Bumper's bags and stuffing them into his hoodie. The usually smiley Bella sitting next to Beca looks like she might burst into tears and Beca… there is no word for Beca's expression right now._

_It's at that moment where she turns her head and catches his eye. "Is this really happening?" She mouths at him._

_Jesse's head shifts to Bumper and Aubrey, then back to Beca, then to Bumper and Aubrey… and back to Beca._

_He shrugs._

"_Stop it! Stop it!" Amy shouts. There's a groan of pain and Aubrey walks back to her seat satisfactorily as Bumper falls face down onto the floor. Things miraculously calm down in less than a second and Donald's sigh of relief is audible to everyone. Jesse decides to spares his cousin and rushes forward with Unicycle to help Bumper. _

_The short boy grunts as he's unceremoniously lifted up. "Freakin-"_

"_You did ask for it," Jesse says snappishly. _

"_Getting involved with a Bella can only bring problems. You know that, right?" Bumper says loud enough to attract Aubrey's glare again as he sneers directly at Beca._

_Jesse frowns as Aubrey widens her eyes and turns to glare at said Bella, the latter of whom answers her captain's glare with an incredulous set of eyebrows. _

"_Stop getting her in trouble," Jesse barks at Bumper, making sure not to raise his voice too loudly as he roughly pushes Bumper back into his seat._

"_Ten minutes, guys," Donald says from the front. _

"_Gotcha," Bumper calls back. He glances at Jesse meaningfully before settling back. "Don't forget what I said."_

* * *

It's not like he did it on purpose.

He swears.

It's just that… bad timing's always been on his side with Beca Mitchell.

Well, this time, it's more like good tming on his part.

But it's bound to get him in trouble with her.

…You know what, though? It might just be worth it.

* * *

**Night Before Regionals - Junior Year**

"Tell me they're kidding."

He gives an apologetic shrug. "Sorry, man. But you did lose the bet," Jesse purses his lips.

Aaron gestures angrily at Unicycle with his free arm. "But he set me up! It's not fair!"

The brunette currently rubbing massage oil on his abdominals barely spares the hazel-eyed boy a passing glance. "How was I supposed to know you had no talent on wheels?"

"What-" Aaron sputters. "That doesn't even make sense! You did something to that thing! My feet slipped right off-"

"Don't call it a _thing_," Unicycle glares at him as he protectively clutches his vehicle. "It's not my fault you underestimated the talent it takes to ride this beautiful item," he sneers.

Jesse runs a hand down his face. "We don't have time for this. Aaron, just get it over with. Please."

Aaron cringes as he reaches forward to knock on the door. He looks over his shoulder to glare as the rest of them start to snicker.

The door opens hastily and a familiar head of curls peeks out. The Bella frowns as she recognizes the backwards maroon hat and steps out further. "Yes?" She raises an eyebrow at the boy rubbing the back of his head and trying to look anywhere but at her.

"I'm here to…" he grimaces as Unicycle snorts from behind him. "I… am here to confess my undying love for you, Alexandra Keaton."

The girl in mention tries not to cringe at her full name and leans against the door coolly. "Is that so?" She asks, her lips twitching. "Well, in that case… I think you girls might want to come see this!" Alex shouts into the room and smirks as Aaron pales.

The guys burst into full laughter while Jesse frowns sympathetically at his friend as Fat Amy, Katherine, and finally, Beca emerge from behind the sunny blonde standing in the doorway. His gaze involuntarily flits over to the blue eyed girl currently staring at them with a bored expression on her face; her eyes come to rest on him for a second before they look away again.

Aaron rubs his hands on his face as he sighs deeply. "Okay. Great." He clears his throat and looks straight at Alex, making her smirk fade away as he contemplates her facial expressions seriously. "It doesn't matter if I have to say in front of just you, or my friends, or your friends and you, or everyone… I like you." He grunts as he gets shoved forward by the shoulder by Brandon. "I mean… I'm crazy about you, Alexandra Keaton."

Alex's eyes narrow into slits as she gives him a contemplative hum. "And how much of that do you mean, exactly? What is this? Some kind of dare? Don't you guys think that's a bit junior high?" she drones mockingly and scowls at Aaron's wide-eyed expression.

Unicycle shrugs and decides to step in. "We just wanted to push Hat here into saying what he's wanted to for the last year or so," he snickers.

The boy in question warily eyes Alex's defeated expression as the girl visibly deflates. "Right," she says quietly.

Jesse opens his mouth to say something as the atmosphere turns into an uncomfortable one, but doesn't get anything out before another voice interrupts his.

"Don't you guys have anything better to do than try to throw us off our game the night before Regionals?" Beca smiles sarcastically at the group as she crosses her arms and comes to stand beside Alex. "Or is your song choice so sucky you're worried about us kicking your asses within the first five minutes?"

It's silent for a beat, before Jesse realizes the rest of the guys are looking at him expectantly for a comeback. "Oh. No, uh, no. We just wanted to… make sure you guys were… fired up for tomorrow…?"

Beca raises both eyebrows at his not so quick wit and she fails to hold in a snort. "Okay, Swanson. And so, what do Aaron and Alex have to do with any of this?" She gestures to the two, both of whom are staring down intently and seemingly counting the cracks on the wooden floor.

Jesse winces as he realizes just how much of an awkward situation they had gotten their friend in. "Aaron's a joker, you know? We just wanted to mess around. For old time's sake." He runs a hand through his hair and glances at Aaron.

"Yeah," the guy nods. "Yeah, Alex knows I like to mess around with her." He tries not to cringe as he feels the full force of Alex's glare on him.

The sophomore takes a deep breath and plasters on a fake smile. "Sure. That's it. Anyway, I'm done here. Good luck tomorrow. You guys will need it." She flounces back into the room, flicking her hair over her shoulder dramatically.

Fat Amy nods. "You heard her, you tiny bird brains," she snickers, ignoring Unicycle who mouths the words back at her confusedly. "Be prepared to lose tomorrow, pee wee's." She grabs Katherine's arm, who continues to look at them weirdly, and drags her back into the room.

Beca eyes Aaron as he stares longingly into the room and purses her lips to the side. "You shouldn't have done that," she tells him.

"I know," he admits dejectedly while the rest of the guys wear puzzled looks on their faces. "It was just a joke."

"Not to her," she narrows her eyes.

Aaron nods and rubs an eye tiredly. "Tell her I'm sorry, will you?"

Beca shrugs and then relents at his pleading look. "Fine," she sighs. She looks over his shoulder and chuckles at the rest of the perplexed faces. "Nothing for you to worry about," she says casually. "Instead, I suggest you guys get a good night's sleep. You'll need it for tomorrow."

There's a series of mumbles as the group starts piling back down the stairs leading outside the dorm. Jesse slinks back and nudges his foot in between the doorway before Beca can fully shut the door. She glances over her shoulder carefully and turns back to look at him with a furrowed brow.

"What was that about?" His head motions to the hall Aaron just disappeared to.

"Are you serious?" Beca asks. "Do you not make it a point to get to know your Trebles, Swanson?"

"You know I do," he crosses his arms. "But Aaron's quiet. And there was a lot of confusion there."

She shakes her head as she glances back into the room. "I can't talk now. It's my turn to roll the dice." She waves off his questioning look. "It's this game we're playing. Look, all I'm saying is… whatever and however you guys decide to mess around, don't involve my Bellas." She glares at him as he fixes her with an amused smile. "I'm serious."

Jesse raises his hands in surrender. "Okay, gotcha. But what was that-"

"Just forget it. See you at Regionals." And then the door is abruptly shut in his face.

"Right," he mumbles. "See you at Regionals."

* * *

"And it's another exciting year for us all, Gail."

"It sure is, John. It sure is. Especially with the two Barden groups coming back to compete for first place in… well, everything I suppose."

"Right you are, Gail. That is some heavily driven competition there. And I know I speak for most when I say that I can't wait to see what they have in store for us this year."

"Especially those Treble-Makers, yum! They always hold our attention at regionals, don't they John?"

"That's because they always sing a song from some iconic male figure, Gail. And they never fail."

"And yet, the Barden Bellas take the cake where it really matters, John."

"I wonder if their loss at Regionals last year had to do with the abnormally amount of females in the audience."

"Well, then it looks like they won't have much luck this year, John. This place looks like a Sorority House."

* * *

"Damn straight, it does."

"Don't worry, Regionals is just the kiddy pool of A-capella," Stacie waves Cynthia Rose off.

"But it's not fair," Lian whines. "Why can't we have more fraternity guy friends?"

"Because we're not sluts. We do not sell our body for ticket purchases to competitions."

"That's Brandon's ex. She's still so obviously in love with him. How pathetic."

"I don't get it. Why does the audience matter?" Kristen asks. "I thought the judges decided on who the winner was."

"The crowd noise wins the team points," Beca answers as she adjusts the yellow and blue scarf around her waistband.

Katherine scoffs, "They're such-"

"Now, ladies. I'm not feeling the positive energy here," Ethan calls over mockingly as their rival group approaches them.

"Back off, sleezeball," Ashley glares. "Why don't you worry about your own little group, hm?"

"It is _not _little!" Unicycle snaps and blushes when Stacie snorts.

Jesse comes up from the group's rear end, running a hand through his hair as he realizes the reason the guys halted so suddenly. "Let's not do this now, yeah?" he says. "Each of us has our own set to worry about. We can make jabs after the winner's announced."

"Agreed," Beca states as she gestures at the rest of the Bellas to walk ahead and ignore the males currently making mocking faces at them.

"It's really too bad," Brandon says as he adjusts his collar and watches them walk away.

"What is?" Benji asks.

"They look good in skirts. And jeans. And everything. And yet… the chance of us gaining the liberty to enjoy it is like one in a hundred."

Ron looks at Brandon surprised and the latter shrugs at him. "What? It's not like we can't admit they're hot." He's met with mumbles of agreement.

Jesse muses over this as he focuses on the cuff of his hoodie. He'd tried not to actually stare at Beca. But as always, that resolve had faded away after catching only a glimpse of her. So he tries to focus on the excellent sewing of his hoodie. He wonders if old ladies did this… She's wearing tight jeans. And he's always loved how jeans look on her… Why are old ladies so good at sewing? That is amazing thread work… That blouse fits her really well, too. A bit too well, actually. Good thing the male audience is minimal… Did Bumper ask their grandmother to do the stitching on this? Because his grandmother knows her stuff… She has her hair down, too. And she looks-

"Awesome!" He winces as he receives a sharp pat on the back. "Kate's here," Brandon snickers. "And she brought her friends."

"Cool," Jesse says back weakly, his eyes subtly moving over to the other side of the room, where the Bellas are preparing to go on.

They get on stage and the music starts playing. Simultaneously, the Trebles' faces pale. "Oh, fu-dge?" Austin corrects himself as Benji glares at him.

"Britney Spears? They're not serious. Are they serious?" Brandon asks frantically as the audience (mostly female) starts cheering loudly.

"They used our tactic to their advantage!" Unicycle groans.

And they did. For some reason, Britney Spears was still a hot commodity among the female population. And yeah, the guys can use Adam Levine all they want. But the Pop Star beats all.

And they're proving it.

_Be a little inappropriate, _

'_Cause I know that everybody's thinking it,_

_When the light's out._

_Shame on me,_

_To need release._

Beca smirks at him from onstage and his knees buckle embarrassingly.

"They're even doing the whistles!" Uncicycle hisses.

"We're so screwed."

"Calm down," Jesse says. "Regionals are ours. And there's no way-"

_I wanna show all the dirt,_

_I got running through my mind, whoa_

"We're screwed," he sighs. His eyes follow Beca's every move, every roll of her hips, every flick of her hair, every-

"No," Kolio moans.

Jesse snaps back to attention. "Okay, seriously. We can still do this. We just need to kick it up a notch," he nods firmly.

"Does anyone have some water?"

"I need a fan… or something."

"Focus," Jesse snaps. He forces himself to keep his gaze locked on the back of the last row of chairs as the Bellas finish up their set. He winces as he hears the telltale roar of applause signaling the end of the song. And they come laughing down the aisle.

"Beat that!" Stacie jests at them victoriously.

"We will pumpkin, don't you worry," Brian tells her mockingly, his green eyes shooting glares left and right at the rival group.

Beca snorts as she appears between Fat Amy and Jessica, crossing her arms and smiling smugly at Jesse. "Good luck, Swanson."

He gives her a nod and pushes the guys forward onto the stage. Jesse makes sure to brush directly past her and takes the Bella scarf tied to her belt loop with a discreet tug. She hardly notices.

"They can't top that, right?" Jessica asks worriedly.

"Nope," Beca says. "But they can try."

"It felt wrong to do a set with just one song, didn't it?"

Fat Amy shrugs. "We did it for the trophy, little ones. One Britney song was enough."

_You chew me up _

_And spit me out_

_Enjoy the taste_

_I leave in your mouth _

_You look at me_

_I look at you_

"Damn Maroon Five," Denise mutters. The rest of the Bellas shift uncomfortably as the group onstage starts strutting like Calvin Klein models.

Stacie adjusts her blouse as the guys dance to a well known choreography. "I think I'm getting turned on… Yup, my boobs tell me I'm turned on."

"Why are we attracted to a-ca freaks?" Alex deadpans, looking away from the stage.

"Whatever," Beca mutters as she tries to angrily glare at Jesse's hand and the way it runs over his neck.

_Dirty babe_

_You see these shackles? _

_Baby, I'm your slave_

_I'll let you whip me if I misbehave_

_It's just that no one makes me feel this way_

"Oh, _hell_ no."

"Justin Timberlake. I hate them."

"Shawshank, you okay?" Fat Amy pounds hard on Beca's back as said Bella starts choking on air.

"I think I know what made her choke up," Stacie says, staring onstage.

Yeah, she does too. It's the Bambi eyed idiot currently tapping his hand against his chest as he shoots her heated looks through hooded eyes.

* * *

"This is a close call, John."

"Very close, Gail. And it's hard to pick a favorite because both Barden groups are performing for such big leagues now."

"Personally, I liked the Treble-Makers' performance, John. It made me run to the ladies room and… splash some water on my face."

"And I can't say anything about the Bellas' performance because, well, it'd probably me put under the label of sexual harassment against minors."

"The judges are turning in the winning card now, John."

* * *

The room is silent as both groups, among two others, anxiously wait for their name to be called in the first place slot. There's a faint, "We love you Brandon," from Kate, but other than that, no audience member makes a sound.

"In third place, the Roackapellas!"

"Blah, blah, blah," Unicycle whispers and the rest shush him.

"In second place… the Barden Treble-Makers!"

They let out huffs of disappointment. "Okay, that's cool, that's cool," Jesse tells them reassuringly as they go and collect their trophy.

"First place, the Barden Bellas!"

"Yes! That's awesome!" Beca laughs as she and Fat Amy high five. Jesse holds back a small smile of his own because, as much as he hates to admit it, he might just be happy for her.

"Girl power, bitches!" Amy shouts as she joins into the collective group hug emitting lots of squealing.

"Huh," Brian sniffs. "I thought we had it for sure."

Unicycle sighs and shakes his head as he rips into a burrito that seemingly came out of nowhere. "Never underestimate the power of Britney. Never."

* * *

He gets the text as soon as he reaches his dorm and he tries not to pump a fist into the air victoriously. It's not that big a deal.

_Why do I get the feeling you know where my Bella scarf is?_

He smirks as he types back a quick message (_How can you be so sure?)_ and throws his phone onto his bed as he changes into something more comfortable.

_Playing coy doesn't become you, Swanson. I need that for rehearsal tomorrow. Come over._

And maybe then, does he pump a fist into the air in victory.

* * *

Like he said, it's not like he did it on purpose.

But he's not complaining.

"Dude!"

"I'm sorry!" He shields his eyes… barely. Okay, no really, he's a gentleman. He does shield them, eventually. "You told me to come over!"

"I didn't think you'd run like a nutcase and barge right in!"

"You should keep your door locked at all times," Jesse tells her, muffling an 'oomph' as he crashes into her desk due to his current lack of sight.

"Swanson," Beca growls as she yanks on a shirt and some yoga pants. "Why do I put up with you?"

"I don't know," he shrugs abashedly. "'Cause I'm a good kisser," he jokes as he finally removes his hand from over his eyes.

He sees Beca snort and turn a bit red and she stands in the middle of the room, under his scrutiny. She shifts as he just stares. "What?" she snaps when a full minute passes. He gets why his gaze is making her uncomfortable; he can feel his eye sockets practically burning from how intently he's looking at her.

"Nothing," he holds his hands up, smiling a little. He won't mention the skin he saw, he's a gentleman. He just can't promise he won't think about it. "Here's your scarf," he says as he takes it out from his pocket and hands it to her.

"Thanks," she purses her lips. "Why'd you take it, anyway?" The scarf is thrown onto the bed, its existence no longer significant.

Jesse chuckles. "To annoy you." _And to get you to text me._ He might just be a bit tired of always being the one who texts first.

Beca rolls her eyes. "Of course." She proceeds to look him over from head to toe and now he's the one squirming.

"What?"

"Nothing," she smirks. "I just don't get how you can be so smooth onstage and so - not - anywhere else."

He scoffs, "Not true. There are plenty of people who would disagree with you. I'll have you know I have witnesses who have seen me at my most charming."

"Right," she drones. "So, since you're here…" Beca groans when she sees a huge smirk light up his face. "Don-"

"You were just about to initiate it. You want to make out with me."

"No-"

"You want me. Probably since this afternoon. At Regionals." He clucks his tongue and smiles widely.

"You're delusional."

His smile slowly fades as his eyes zero in on her. "I wanted you, too. Still do." _Especially since I just saw you in your underwear._

Beca takes a breath to compose herself and glances up at him as she puts her hair behind her ears. "Okay, then. Let's… do it."

He lets out a snort and she glares at him. "Sorry, but you have to admit we need a more comfortable way to get things going."

"_Get things going?_" She mocks. "Now who's the corny one?"

"Beca-"

"And what else am I supposed to say, exactly?"

"Beca."

"What? _Initiate make-out session?_ 'Cause that sounds-"

"Beca, shut up," he grabs onto her waist and pulls her into him, none too gently. Their mouths smack together and he whispers a "Sorry," against her lips. Jesse runs his hand along the hem of her shirt, silently asking permission. He feels her smile against his mouth and push her body up against his.

Well, if _that's_ not an invitation…

He carries her easily over to the bed considering she doesn't weigh much… at all. He wonders if it's possible for a tinier being to exist. Jesse's distracted by his thoughts as he feels Beca's tongue start to coax his mouth open and in response, he presses her down harder into the mattress. His insides are on fire and he swears his neck tingles from the way Beca runs her nails down the nape of it.

"Easy there, Swanson," Beca smirks against his lips when she feels the evidence of his immense enjoyment of their current activities.

"Shit," he sighs into her neck. "Sorry," Jesse tries to turn his bottom half away from her.

He's surprised when she pulls him back to her and tugs on his hair. "I never said you had to stop."

Jesse leans back to look at her closely. Her blue eyes are awake and completely haze free. In them, he sees something he didn't think he'd see so soon.

It's trust.

"Beca," he murmurs.

"I don't want to talk about it, Jesse," she says quietly, her eyes shutting close. "I just…"

"I'm not going to do anything you don't want me to do," he answers back, leaning over to lay a kiss on her temple.

"I know," Beca opens her eyes and smiles at him. "I know you won't. But I do want this."

He looks unsure and she sighs as she uses all of her strength to roll them over. _Nerd's strong. _"I do, Jesse," she says seriously. "I do." Her hair falls over one side of his face as she touches her nose to his.

He lets a few seconds pass by as he measures the look in her eyes. When he senses her start to get self-conscious, he takes over. His hand trails down her spine reassuringly as his lips follow the path of her jaw. She sighs in relief against his cheek and they both sit up to tug off his shirt. It's obvious this won't be one of those cliché, perfectly paced movie love scenes because his shirt gets stuck around his ears. "Help me?" he mumbles. He hears Beca chuckle and winces as she pulls it off roughly.

"Sorry," she says unapologetically. He mock glares at her and pushes her back down onto the bed so his stomach rubs against hers once she takes her shirt off, too. "You do know how to take off a bra, right?" she jokes.

Jesse smiles against her cheek and nods. "Even if I couldn't, we'd have a lot of fun figuring it out." He swallows her laughter and Beca clings to the back of his neck as their mouths slant over one another.

They barely have any clothing left when Jesse says, "Hey, Bec." She raises a questioning eyebrow at him. "After this, you can consider yourself officially Treble-boned," he smirks cheekily at her.

Beca's nose scrunches up in laughter and she smiles hugely before she kisses him to shut him up.

And in that moment, it's safe to say that he's a goner.


	11. Love Causes It

I start university again on Monday. SOS please.

* * *

_**Semi-Finals – Freshman Year**_

_She tries hard not to flinch at Aubrey's biting words; and she manages._

_But then she looks around at all the faces; Amy and Jessica, Chloe and Denise, Cynthia Rose, Stacie. They can't meet her eyes. And not even Amy can give her a straight answer. It's the first time, since she'd gotten used to the group of weirdos, that she feels like she doesn't fit in. She thought she'd been helping. Well, apparently she'd just been messing them up. _

_She wishes she could take back the scathing remark she sends Chloe three seconds later. But the damage is already done, and now she feels guilty on top of being… majorly pissed, for lack of a better word, at Aubrey. Militaristic, controlling Aubrey, whose words are doing a swell job of making her want to smack something. Preferably the blonde's face. _

_Unfortunately, the one person who steps in to defend her from Aubrey's wrath is the same person she's already messed up one too many times with. _

"_I know you're hooking up with Jesse." That one statement throws her off the edge._

_Even she can admit to herself that that nerd, her nerd, is the one guy she knows can loosen her tight grip on the metaphorical boxing gloves used to keep people at a safe distance. A distance that won't jeopardize her L.A.-centered future, or the control she'd acquired during her parents' divorce; the one that makes sure her facial expression never shows more than she wants it to; the one that allows her to depend solely upon herself, and no one else. _

_But those gloves, no matter how much of a punch they pack in them, are really wearing her out. They're heavy and she's getting tired of trying to hold her fists up. So she had let go a bit. You can't join a band of misfits and not get caught up in their antics. It's distracting and your grasp slackens. The Bellas ran headfirst into the titanium gloves and made cracks. And Jesse practically broke them in half. Yet, she can't have both. So her loyalties went to the one she knew would need her as much as she needed them. _

_Turns out though, the Bellas don't seem to need her as much. _

_And Jesse… well, Jesse scares her._

"_Jesus Christ! That's perfect. _Of course_ you're here right now. I don't need your help, okay? Can you _back off_?"_

_Beca turns back to the group and ignores Chloe's disapproving stare, as well as the brick in her chest that's making it hard to breathe. "If this is what I get for trying," and there's nothing more to say. Her feet power-walk her to the nearest exit, and she thanks whatever deity's up there for being able to march past the Trebles. She ignores Bumper's stern glare and Donald's confused stare. She ignores Benji's voice calling her name. _

_When the cool air hits her face, she turns her head to look for the payphone, cursing the fact that her Bella outfit is too tight to carry her cellphone in it. She sees it on the far left corner and strides forwards, trying to ignore how her pace falters with each step, until she has to stop in the middle of the sidewalk to take off her heels before walking again. _

_Calling the cab is a blur, but she gets ten minutes to sit down and try to process what exactly she'd said. And when she decides not to think about it, she realizes it's too late._

_The image of Jesse's… heartbroken face… is imprinted in her mind for good. _

* * *

_"Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it."_ - Woody Allen

"Beca."

It starts with her name. And she only ever has an empty answer.

* * *

"So I was like, no way am I doing _that _with a guy I met _two _days ago. Maybe if I had known him for three..."

_Hours turn into days, minutes into hours, and seconds into minutes._

"But he kept on insisting! And that's when I knew he hadn't gotten laid in what was probably months…"

_Everything's happening so slowly and it's too much. Her senses are dulled; it makes everything foggy. One second, she doesn't know where she is, what she's doing, and the next she's highly aware of how he's feathering her cheek with his fingertips and everything's just so much clearer._

"I mean, god, poor guy. I obviously felt sorry for him, you know? I can't even _imagine…"_

_She can taste the sweat on his neck and feel his lips buzzing against her skin. He takes her lobe into his mouth and gently nips it. She can hear his incoherent mumblings not long after and wishes she could just concentrate enough to focus on what he's saying to her. _

"Let me tell you something, sex is the most important thing in life. It completes you. _It fulfills you. _And it will have the greatest impact on you…"

_She's scared, actually. Her eyes are closed. And they will stay that way. Because as much as she wants to hear him whisper sweet nothings, as much as she wants to see him and maybe even find that same look of adoration he had for her so long ago, she can't. She won't. She's afraid._

"Even more important is who you share it with. Not everyone is a possible candidate, you know… _No Lilly, _I did not end up sleeping with that ToneHanger. I have standards… Well, I almost did but it doesn't count because…"

_She trusts him. She does. She just never imagined… it would be this slow… or feel anything at all like this. At the beginning, his shirt had gotten stuck around his head and his arm had fallen asleep not shortly after that; not to mention her little incidents too. It had started off so damn playful and the air had been filled with their embarrassed chuckles. When had it become so serious? How is he doing this to her? How is she letting him?_

"Always keep it casual is what I say…"

_It's anything but casual. She can feel his chest pressed against hers, and his skin burning. Her fingertips tingle. That's it, isn't it? He's going to burn her. There is no way this can end well for her._

"Have fun. Fool around. We don't need to find that one person we will only ever want for the rest of our lives yet. This is our moment. And we'll make mistakes, sure…"

_But no, it hadn't been a mistake. How could something – something that had encompassed her whole and left her feeling so secure – be a mistake?_

"But that's what sex is about. I mean, it's just sex, not making love. So enjoy it…"

_Making love? No._

"Beca!"

Her head snaps back up to find Lilly and Stacie staring at her with identical looks of befuddlement from across the restaurant booth. She gulps down the bitter taste of denial in her mouth before looking at where she feels the milkshake she had accidentally spilled, drip down her arm. She frowns and hurriedly snatches up some napkins to clean the mess, ignoring the two women making her neck flush with their steady stare.

"Are you okay?" She hears Lilly ask quietly. She peeks up at her and nods once, standing up to discard the napkins and hurriedly making her way out of the sheltered space for some fresh air. She can hear Lilly and Stacie follow quickly behind her after paying the tab. She doesn't want them to follow, doesn't need the suffocation of the Bellas for the first time ever because she can't talk to them about this. She can't tell them she's going behind their back like this. What has she done? What is she _doing_?

"Yo, Beca!" Stacie's arm reaches out to grasp hers and stop her fast-paced walk. "What's going on?" Her friend asks her exasperatedly as Beca keeps her back to her and tries to keep her breath from coming out in small pants.

_It wasn't making love._

"Nothing," she whirls around and smiles tightly at them. "I was just distracted and I think the sun was getting to me."

_It was lust._

"You've been distracted a lot lately," Stacie crosses her arms and raises a perfectly plucked eyebrow at her. "I want to know what's going on with you."

_Lust. So she's lying to the people she most cares about because of lust?_

"I'm sorry," Beca winces. "I've just been going through some things… with my dad." Oh, that's low. That's a whole other issue right there. Now she's using her _dad_ as an excuse?

Lilly and Stacie's faces morph to a look of understanding and they smile sympathetically at her. "Oh," is all Stacie says as she rubs her arm soothingly. "I'm sorry, Beca." Lilly comes up to hug her from the side and Beca's head turns to rest on hers as two pairs of arms come around her.

What kind of a friend is she?

"I'm sorry," she whispers, trying to speak through a mouthful of hair. Sorry for lying. Sorry for breaking our promise. Just sorry.

"Why?" Stacie pulls back to looks at her quizzically. "We know your relationship with your dad goes through some rough patches," she says as Lilly nods in agreement with her. "It's not your fault. We understand. Just try not to space out on us too much. You know you can talk to us."

God, someone pull out the knife stabbing her in the gut _right now_.

"Okay," she hopes the corners of her lips tilt up like she means them to. "I know."

But there's not much to tell really.

Just, you know… she's been Treble-Boned.

* * *

Her leg's twitching uncontrollably.

Fat Amy's typing away on her laptop, singing along to Mariah Carey's _Touch My Body _at the same time. Beca can't exactly concentrate on her mixes but she's not going to say anything. If she opens her mouth, words will come rushing out and she'll wish she were dead. Amy has a way of doing that to her. There's no way to keep her guard up around her voluptuous friend. And she does not need a lecture on sex right now.

Her eye starts twitching next.

Her mouth will stay shut. It will stay permanently sealed until it's time for Amy to go to her biology class. There is nothing to say. There is nothing to comment on. She will not ask. She will not speak.

Fat Amy raises her voice as she gets to the main chorus and even adds in exaggerated sound effects while eying Beca discreetly.

Beca throws her pen down hard onto the desk before swiveling the chair around to face Amy with a glare. Her Australian buddy just smiles cheekily at her.

"How do you always know?" Beca squints at her. Something is seriously up with this girl. Voodoo magic or some shit.

Fat Amy slams her laptop shut as she sits up and fixes Beca with an incredulous gaze. "I know everything, Toothpick. It's my specialty. Well that, and my curvaceous body. 'Cause only I know how to use it, _uh_!" she finishes with a model worthy pose.

Beca looks to the heavens for help before relenting and finally opening her mouth. "Amy…" she wrings her hands together. "How do you know… the difference between – sex – and…" Don't. Just shut up. "…you know, 'making love' crap." Someone please shut her up right now.

"Ah," Amy nods sagely. "I knew you were going to come to me with this question sooner or later."

"You did?" Beca leans back in her chair and arches an elegant brow doubtfully. "How?"

"Beca," Amy shakes her head at her like it's obvious and Beca sort of wants to hit her with something. "You come into rehearsal three days ago, looking like you just had the best sexy nighttime of your life, and you, what, expect me not to notice anything? …And also because you had a hickey, right about here," Amy points to a specific spot on her neck, right near the jawline.

Beca gasps involuntarily as her hands snaps up to cover the aforementioned spot and she scowls over at Amy when she starts chuckling.

"Relax, Shawshank."

"Just answer my question," Beca's scowl deepens.

"Okay." Amy sighs as she stands up to pace around the room. "Let's put it this way, little Toothpick. Sex is forgettable. You can move on without a hitch and you'll have other experiences that top that one instance in which you let your inner loins control you." Fat Amy stares at Beca intently as she says this and nods at the pensive look on her face. "Making love… well, one noticeable difference is that, usually, the parties involved will say at least one 'I Love You' throughout the moment-"

"Oh," Beca sighs in relief. "Okay, then. Problem solved. None of that was mentioned. Good." She wipes a hand across her forehead tiredly.

"Of course," Fat Amy continues. "What is so beautiful and even confusing about this concept, is that the parties involved will not always realize they're making love."

Beca frowns at her from across the room and shifts in her chair.

"See, there's this little thing called denial, or even oblivion," Amy continues as she narrowly assesses Beca. "That can very much get in the way of this realization-"

"I don't think-"

"_So _let me tell you something, Shawshank. Sex can start off in a lot of ways. It can be purely physical, casual, a means to an end... but no matter how much you might think it's only based on physical attraction, or just lust, the way the night – or day or whatever time you like to have sex at – progresses and, most importantly, ends, is what truly matters."

Beca is sure she's about to lose her marbles if Amy doesn't stop staring at her that intently any time soon.

"So, ask yourself, how did the night progress, Shawshank?"

How did the night progress?

_She feels him smile against her cheek as he intertwines their fingers, keeping them tightly locked together. "Jesse," she sighs unevenly as he slowly runs his nose down her neck. "Beca," he murmurs against her soft skin. "I've waited a long time to hear you say my name like that."_

She stands up from the desk chair so quickly it falls backwards and lands hard on the floor. Amy watches her with bug eyes from her relaxed perch on Beca's bed and rests her chin on her palm as she calmly waits for her small friend to have the epiphany she'd always known was coming.

"No," Beca shakes her head back and forth, trying to keep her grip on the edge of the desk from slackening. She might feel a bit sick; a bit like panicking. She's panicking. She's panicking. _She's panicking. _"No," she repeats, not daring to look at Amy.

Fat Amy sighs as she plops down onto the bed and raises her eyes to the ceiling, trying to give Beca her space.

"That was over and done with," the Bella captain tries to say with conviction, digging the heels of her hands into her eyes. "This is- this- I can't do this again." And she won't.

Amy gives a loud huff as she sits back up and narrows her eyes at Beca. "I have one more question."

"Amy," she responds tiredly.

The curvy woman ignores her. "How did the night end? And what was the morning after like?"

All Beca can reply with is a distressed groan.

"That bad, huh?"

* * *

_She wakes up with a lazy smile on her face, feeling warm and serene in a way she hasn't felt for a while. She stretches one arm over her head a bit before realizing she can't move her other one because it's interlocked with the hand belonging to the arm her head's resting on. Her eyes flutter open, her insides still warm as she stares at the masculine fingers carefully cradling hers. Beca's eyes follow her own fingers as they gently untangle from his and run over the smooth skin on his palm. Her mouth quirks up when she's conscious enough to feel the soft breathing by the back of her neck, softly hitting the strands of hair near her ear. She feels one strong arm on top of the sheet around her waist and moves her other hand down to stroke the fine hairs there. If she could wake up to this – to him – every morning for the rest of – forever, maybe – then she's pretty sure she'd be the happiest – _

Oh, shit.

_Her body's position drastically changes from comfortable and placid to rigid and stiff to the bone. Her eyes are wide open as they take in her surroundings in their no longer hazy state. She's in her room. On her bed. With Jesse wrapped around her. And she's clutching onto him like she has no intention of letting go. _

Oh, shit.

_She tries to take a calming breath as her eyes flit over to the alarm clock resting on her night table. 8:09. They talk enough that she knows he has to be at the Treble house at 8:30 for whatever football game the guys want to watch this morning. All she has to do is wait for Jesse to wake up, leave, and then she can get her act together. That's all. She can wait. _

_Her body stays tense for five more minutes before she feels him start to shift from behind her and hurriedly tries to relax her posture to make it seem like she's still asleep. Her eyes stay shut as she feels him scoot closer, and then suddenly lean over her to check the time, cursing softly under his breath as he does so and getting off the bed to put on his discarded clothes. She tries hard to ignore the disappointment weighing in her chest, but her damn emotions seem uncontrollable. _

_What's harder to ignore however, is the hope and heat that spreads through her chest as Jesse turns at the last second before leaving to brush some hair off her face and place a lingering kiss on her temple. Her wide smile is hard to hold back once she hears the door click close, but then she remembers her predicament, and it abruptly falls. _

* * *

"Okay!" She jumps as Amy claps her hands loudly and comes over to kneel beside her on the floor. "This can all be fixed, Toothpick. Just let me rub off some of my Amy Magic on you and your problems will be gone in no time," Fat Amy grins, holding her arms out as if she's just presented the most amazing thing humankind has ever witnessed.

"I don't think it's that easy, Am-"

"First step: _Acceptance_."

"Hah," Beca barks out a laugh. "Not exactly the easiest step, is it?"

Fat Amy crosses her arms and tilts her head at Beca. "If you don't try, then how will you reconcile with Man Candy, Beca?"

She freezes as she realizes what Amy's implying. She lifts her head up from her arms to fix a stern gaze on the woman next to her. "I never told you who it is. And whoever you're thinking of, it's not him," she lies through her teeth.

Amy lifts her chin and eyes her carefully. "I know you didn't. I did take a mighty guess, but if you say it's wrong, since you're a mind reader and all, then I guess it's wrong. I know that I can't actually be sure of who said person is."

"I know that you know that you can't be sure."

"I know that you know that I know that I can't be sure."

"I know that – " Beca rubs her forehead. "Okay, nevermind. This is all just giving me a headache."

"Just one more thing: Just because some things are left unspoken, doesn't mean they're not there."

She bites her lip as she contemplates that one statement. "…Let's just not talk about this anymore. Deal?"

"Deal." Fat Amy lifts herself from the floor to collect her things. She's done pushing Beca. When her friend needs her, she'll go to her. But for now, she's not going to push. "Need to get going now, Shawshank. I'll see you tomorrow at rehearsal."

"Bye Amy," Beca replies half-heartedly. Once the door clicks shut, she leans her head back onto the oak wooden desk and stares hollowly at her empty bed. Unwillingly, she wonders about the image she and Jesse made that night. And that morning. She wonders if anyone else would have called it 'making love'. And she wishes she could have controlled her feelings before they'd gotten out of hand. She wonders. And she thinks. And then she rubs the bridge of her nose angrily because her mind isn't helping matters.

Her phone makes her jump when it starts ringing unexpectedly and she looks at the screen confusedly when it reads 'Amy'. "Yeah?" she questions once she picks up.

"It's unspoken, Beca. But it's real."

"Amy," she groans loudly before ending the call and tossing the phone onto her bed, wincing when it accidentally hits the wall.

She knows she needs to clear her head; forget it all for at least a little bit. So she turns to the only thing that's always kept her on her feet and lifted her up when she's needed it. Her mixes. Because her music can erase any bad thought from her mind and that's what she needs. To solely focus on anything that has nothing to do with Jesse Swanson. And music has never let her down.

Well, has _almost _never let her down.

* * *

It's nine o'clock when she hears hard knocking on her door through her head phones. By the sound of it, the person's been keeping this up for a while because the pounding grows continuously louder. She's annoyed as she pulls her headphones down to her neck and glares at the door, willing for whoever's on the other side to leave her in peace, at least for tonight. It's not until she hears his voice calling her name that the panic suddenly clogs her throat and she can only stare wide-eyed at the solid structure keeping her effectively hidden from his view.

"Beca! I know you're in there. Open up!"

She winces as she recognizes the tone he's using. He's angry with her. And it's not like she can play innocent. She hasn't actually answered any of his texts or calls in the last three days. In fact, it's safe to say she's gone out of her way to avoid him completely; even skipping their shared shifts at the station.

"Beca!"

Yeah, it was wrong, she knows. And now… now she's going to have to answer the door.

First step: stand up. Second step: Walk forward. Third step: Grab the doorknob, and turn.

Okay, but she's sort of stuck on the second step because her feet aren't moving.

"_Mitchell!"_

Oh, crap.

She treats it like ripping off a band aid. Not a nanosecond later, Beca's swinging the door open and bravely meeting Jesse's livid gaze as he stands just outside her doorway, fist still raised in the air to continue knocking.

The first thing she notices is that his face seems to return to its normal hue once he takes her in, his eyes roving her body as if searching for any possible injuries that could count as an acceptable excuse for all but disappearing in the last three days. His brows crease in confusion when they find nothing and his eyes regain that spark of anger when he realizes that it's a high probability she has no good reason for having ignored him. But then they flit up to her face, where she's still staring wide eyed at him, and it's like a one-eighty degree turn because his features soften with something akin to relief.

Maybe because she opened the door. Maybe because he can finally look at her again after three days with no contact whatsoever. Maybe it's just because he's happy to be within reach of her.

She hates it. If he can forgive her so easily, it means they're both in deep shit. But she can fix this. She can do what she's done since sophomore year.

She can make him angry.

"_What the hell_ is your problem?" she hisses, putting on her darkest scowl. "What if I had a friend in here? Or what if one of them was on their way over and had seen you banging on my door like a fucking lunatic? _Are you insane?_" She tries to slam the door back in his face but his hand snaps out to stop it.

He looks surprised. He looks incredulous. And now his neck's flushing red, which means the anger's back.

Perfect.

"_Are you kidding me?_" Jesse gets out through gritted teeth, grabbing her hip to firmly push her backwards into the room as he closes the door behind him. "You have no right to be angry with me. I'm the one who should be giving you hell right now." The hand on her hip tightens its grip, but it's surprisingly gentle, and his actions contradict the chagrin showing on his face. "Where have you been?"

"Busy," she snaps back. "What? We sleep together and now I have to keep you a play by play of my daily life?" Sleeping together… Sure, that sounds better than 'making love'.

She watches as Jesse runs a hand down his face; probably because he's so damn frustrated. But hey, he's the one who decided to get mixed up with her, right? "You're just so goddamn impossible sometimes," he mutters, almost to himself. "You know what I mean. You should have at least warned me about your little disappearing act," he tells her. There's a frown on his face and it looks so wrong there; she wants to reach up and smooth the lines on his forehead. And maybe even rub her thumb across his cheekbone in apology.

See? She needs to stop this madness.

Beca does her best to look indignant. "Geez, Swanson! It's not like I meant to worry you. I just wanted to work on Bella stuff. We agreed not to mention anything a-capella related between us so I didn't think it important to tell you. Why are you freaking out over nothing?"

"Why couldn't you have at least answered one measly text, Mitchell?" Jesse stares hard at her. "You made me feel like a teenage girl who'd just been used for her body and then dumped unceremoniously."

Beca swallows and tries to roll her eyes convincingly. "Wow, big words." Jesse purses his lips and glares at her until she starts shifting in place uncomfortably. "Okay," she finally relents after a full minute of silence. "I'm sorry. I am. I just… I got nervous about seeing you again."

"I thought you wanted to – " he begins in a panicked tone.

"I did," Beca tries to placate him. He still looks unsure so she decides to be more honest with him, because he obviously means something, even if she's not yet willing to admit it to herself, and she won't let Jesse think that she regrets it.

Because she really doesn't.

"I meant what I said," she says slowly and surely, making sure to look straight at him as she steps closer and grips his arm. "I trust you. And I wanted it, just like you. I just thought… it would be awkward to see each other so soon. I didn't really expect it to happen that way, and I'm sure I can say the same for you, so…" she trails off at the confused look on Jesse's face.

"What do you mean?" He asks her as he squeezes her hip softly.

Her brow furrows. Didn't he know? Hadn't he felt it, too?

Oh, god.

Staring at his perplexed face now, she feels the weight of the ugly truth threaten to push her down and swallow her whole.

She's the only one who thinks that they might have made love without meaning to. She's the only one panicking because it was only _her _stupid feelings for the nerd that came surging forward unexpectedly.

To Jesse, it was just sex. It was exactly what they had expected. Just a means to an end. Exactly what they had agreed on from the beginning.

_"It means that we're just having fun. It means that you're my distraction. And it doesn't go farther than that."_

She hadn't realized she'd be the one going back on her words.

"Beca?"

She sucks in a breath and tries not to exhale shakily. This was what she wanted. Jesse didn't feel anything. This makes it easier. Not it's only her emotions she has to get under control.

"Nevermind," she answers hollowly. "I should have texted, but I was stressing out over nothing. I wanted to test the waters, to see how we'd be around each other afterwards, but… I guess I thought you might have regretted it. It was all just one big misunderstanding," she says tightly with a nod, staring at a point past his shoulder.

Beca feels Jesse's hand tip her chin up to his face so he can search her eyes. She doesn't know what he's looking for; just that he's intuitive enough to know she's hiding something. And so she tries to relax and keep her eyes clear as she gives him a small, fake smile.

His brown orbs stare into her own blue ones for a second longer, before he takes her face in his hands and rests his forehead on hers to say, "I don't regret it, Bec."

She lets out a small sigh of relief as she grasps onto his elbows and leans her body into his. "Me neither."

* * *

The next afternoon, she sits cross-legged on her bed and stares at her phone for two full on minutes while she debates the consequences of the decision she's about to make. When she finally does snatch it up to dial, her heart is thrumming in her chest and she knows she should have done this a long time ago. The ringing in her ears manages to ease her nerves somewhat.

"_Beca!"_

She smiles once she hears the familiar voice chirp her name. "Chloe."

This is going to run up a long phone bill.

"I need your help. Turns out you were right. I've dug myself into a hole I can't climb out of."


End file.
